HOW TO GET OVER A CRUSH IN 1 DAY
"I think it's safe to say that I have a crush. Well, more like sad to say that I have a crush seeing that it has lastest for, come august, and entire year. The title of this blog series is becoming more evident as the days goes by. People always say be careful what you name something. Ok, people don't always say that but I know I do and that is real enough for me."
he is beautiful. everytime i see him i revert to being in middle school. he is the sweetest, most intelligent and funniest person to chill with and everyday i ask myself what could he possibly gain from me. and i reply, "the same thing he gives you." he's what i like to call the everyman. he literally knows everything about music. he is a walking encylopedia. he just started writing poetry and everytime he writes i new piece i get the chance to hear it before anyone else. his talents exceed anything you could ever imagine. but while im gushing about this person i know he isnt gushing for me.
i made my crush known the day of my birthday of last year. lesson number 1: never text message someone that you like them. it makes you appear to be a huge DORK!
he didnt reply. so all night i stayed up thinking about how much i was such a dumbass for doing that. i was too scared to tell him face to face because i was afraid of how much the repulsed expression on his face could do to a person of my insecure stature. ive told boys that ive liked them plenty of times. and everytime they just stood there looking. not saying anything. i swear you could hear my heart fall to the bottom of my feet. so i figured this would be the safe route. boy was i wrong.
the next night we talked about it. he began to tell me how he wasnt looking to be in a relationship right now. so i stopped him in mid sentence before the rest of my face decided to slip off. i just thought that maybe this time i would get it right. i told him that it was alright and he didnt have to finish. we ended up talking about music till 5 in the morning.
a few days ago i realized that ive had the same crush on one person for an entire year. im pathetic. whats the point of pinning away for someone if they pine away for you too. sitting at home hoping to see if he will call me is not very productive. i feel like such an idiot. he makes me what to better myself. i have taken up the goal of trying to stop cursing. he makes me want to have a clean mouth. which is weird seeing that he curses but i have a tendency to overuse my words. i want to offer my best self to him. even after hes seen my worst. and hope that he would want it after its been cleaned and polished. i so need to get over him. anyone have tips on how to get over a crush?
i made my crush known the day of my birthday of last year. lesson number 1: never text message someone that you like them. it makes you appear to be a huge DORK!
he didnt reply. so all night i stayed up thinking about how much i was such a dumbass for doing that. i was too scared to tell him face to face because i was afraid of how much the repulsed expression on his face could do to a person of my insecure stature. ive told boys that ive liked them plenty of times. and everytime they just stood there looking. not saying anything. i swear you could hear my heart fall to the bottom of my feet. so i figured this would be the safe route. boy was i wrong.
the next night we talked about it. he began to tell me how he wasnt looking to be in a relationship right now. so i stopped him in mid sentence before the rest of my face decided to slip off. i just thought that maybe this time i would get it right. i told him that it was alright and he didnt have to finish. we ended up talking about music till 5 in the morning.
a few days ago i realized that ive had the same crush on one person for an entire year. im pathetic. whats the point of pinning away for someone if they pine away for you too. sitting at home hoping to see if he will call me is not very productive. i feel like such an idiot. he makes me what to better myself. i have taken up the goal of trying to stop cursing. he makes me want to have a clean mouth. which is weird seeing that he curses but i have a tendency to overuse my words. i want to offer my best self to him. even after hes seen my worst. and hope that he would want it after its been cleaned and polished. i so need to get over him. anyone have tips on how to get over a crush?
I am happy for all of the wonderful comments to this note. I must say that I was able to get over this person. It took him to be a true ass for me to wake up to reality but I am glad it is out of my system. There isn't anything really profound to say on this matter other than that it is important to get over these horrible infuations. Please find yourself. Love yourself. I know this is hard to get. I am still struggling. But we must regain our true self. Peace to you all. (Dec. 30 08)
posted by mamaafreeka at 5:44 AM
183 Comments:
wow THAT HELPS. not. you guys are retards!! how is this supposed to help me get over my NINE YEAR crush?!?!?! dude guys get help from this website: sheena's little fragments of time
seriously it helped me a BUUUUNCH
especially #4
do it!
it helped me
HEARTS HEARTS HEARTS
well i actually had a crush on a man that was ten years older than me i ended up getting with him and me being stupid had sex with him and messed it up for myself probably I've been thinking about him every since that night he hasn't returned any of my phone calls after that night so i just left him alone but i still think about him every day for about 4 months now wondering what it would be like if we would had ended up together. however i want to call him so bad since it has been a long time since i talked to him i wont because i don't want him to no that i still like him like that anymore even though i do, i mean i may be sprung right now but i wont ever stalk a man because that just ain't my style,because i look to good for that for one but do i hope some day that we will end up together but if not ill just have to move on with my life, but only time can tell. but my advise to any unrequited lovers out there i mean the best way to get over a unrequited love to me is to get with a another person you no keep yourself occupied getting your mind off the person that person u have that unrequited love for, and you never no you might come across someone that you'll have the same unrequited love for and they might the same for you. i mean there's always someone for everyone don't let anyone tell you thats not true because it is. i must admit I've never thought about any one this much but i hope and pray that this don't last that long because i has been hard trying to get over him. but ill eventually get over him one way or another.
I'm in the same boat but I'm close to 60, feeling like a teenager. Infatuated with a man I met in a 12 step program, he was new so I backed off after he came on to me, I didn't want to interfere with him being in early recovery. Since then it's been mixed signals, maybe he's met someone else, but I think about him so much of the time, have to keep myself busy with work and other responsibilities, but sooner or later I am fantasizing about him. I guess this too shall pass eventually, just have to accept it. I do pray for him and for his wellbeing, that God blesses him with whatever/whoever makes him happy, and that means accepting that it might not be me that makes him happy. And I have to remember that God has a plan for me, even though I don't have the faintest idea what it is. Keep the faith!
Agh! Why is it so hard to get over a crush who doesn't like you in return? I met this guy a year ago in Europe, we hooked up and hung out when we got back to the states and then didn't speak for 10 months. I thought I was over him but instead decided to email him, saying that I really wanted to see him again, and I did. I flew down to his condo to stay with him for about a week, had an amazing time, did everything together that I loved to do and felt like he was a perfect fit for me. I went home and haven't heard from him since!
It's really time for me to get over this but I can't stop thinking that he'll finallly call or email or text when really, he's just not interested. I'm so much stronger than this. Help me out!!!
I understand completely I've been obsessed with a guy since the begginning (I think i spelled that wrong.) of the school year. Which isn't that long. I've done this sooooooo many times before, fallen for a guy I can't have. I should know by now. I thought that I actually had a chance with him though. hah. He is so incredibly hot and a year older than me which is perfect for a high-schooler like me. He seemed so nice and shy and he was. He recently broke up with his gf of like 4 weeks and 2 of the 4 he slept with her which scares me, I'm not like that. He told me she talked him into it but something about his story isn't believeable. Despite what he's done I wanna help him and save him from what he's doing I really want to hold him when no one else does. Most of my friends don't like him and tell me I can do better but something about him was different. I've never had a 'bf' but I've had unusually close friends... hehe. He was th first guy that I liked first. All of the girls that have talked to me tell me that he's a player and I don't wanna believe them but if that's the truth I don't have much of a choice.I really really care for him and want the beset for him... I'm not the best but I only want him to be careful and I want to be his one and only. I understand completely and wish I could help you. God knows I need help.
I've had a crush on a guy for about two and a half years now. He was in my high school and we had been in the same music class since sixth grade. I didn't start liking him till Junior year, when sometimes I'd see him look at me or if we talked about stuff he'd occasionally tease me a little, but I didn't start doing anything till my Senior year. I asked him to the Homecoming Dance and he rejected me by saying he didn't go to dances. Though he apologized the next day, I still felt heartbroken and he's never treated me the same since. On New Years Day, I just sent him a friendly message to tell him "Happy New Year" and he didn't even respond back to it. I really need help getting over him!
As for those who need advice on getting over someone, well all I can really say is, don't ever despair and believe in the hope that there's love. It's really hard to believe (I should know as I'm having a hard time too), but I had two crushes before this crush and I managed to get over them.
i know what you mean...and i'm only 18 yet i have been trying to get over the same guy for three years. it makes me so angry because sometimes i just feel like he stole my ability to trust anyone else and to open up like i used to. i feel so naive and stupid....he just toyed with my emotions, took advantage of my feelings, lied and told me what i wanted to hear but in the end i was left completely in the dark. sometmes i really just sit back and really analyse the situation and i still don't understand how it turned out that way. Time may heal but it can never erase your memory or reverse events of the past.
i totally know how u all feel. I've have a huge crush on the same guy for about 4 years now. When we first met i thought He was perfect for me, And when our mutally friend told me he had a crush on me i thought i was going to die. He was the shy type so i never heard it from him. We've encountered each other couple of times during these past four years. When i started college i promised myself i was going to get over him and i was. But then during break, I saw him again and all those feelings came rushing back. He flirted. and I felt something. It kills me that everytime i get to see him i feel something soo strong inside of me. I don't know if he still feels the same attraction he felt 4 years ago. He doesn't know that i found out he liked me. I mean, i heard he had a couple of girlfriends and hookups. I dont know him too well, but i wish i had the opportunity to be with him. Everytime i saw him i would analyze our encounters. He gives mixed signals. I don't know what to think. Men are so complicated. My friendship or whatever with this crush is blurry to me. He even drunk dialed me once and wanted to talk to me, which totaly threw me off. Then when i saw him, it was like nothing happened. I dunt know but time will help me get over him again..i hope.
Heartening to see so many different responses. Getting out of a messy relationship I never ever thought I would feel for anyone..I was so content and relieved to be alone again..free and happy to do all I like to do.
Its always in these moments when life is all set and perfect that you go ahead and make a fool of yourself. I have too...and though I know there is no future, he doesn't want to take it further, and that this is only interrupting my life and work...I am happy to daydream, drawing mean out of every song, associating words to suit my interpretations.
I think the only solution to this is to give it time...and accept that if this person really wanted to be with me he would make some effort. So time it is I guess...infatuation like the common cold must run its course.
I know how you feel. In Oct. I met a 29 yr old, (I'm in my 30s) pretty, hispanic girl (from Ecuador) in church who is so sweet and friendly. She was never with, or mentioned, a guy so after a couple weeks of talking to her quite a bit, in Nov. I took a shot and asked her on a lunch date. She said yes but was "busy the next couple weeks" but things would then slow down. The next week when it came up she said she was still interested and hadn't changed her mind. She assured me "we'd do something before year's end and she'd let me know when" (with a smile)- of course it never happened. It turned out she was a recent college grad and was quite active at school, knew a ton of people, and was becoming super active in her newly-found church. She was so "awkward" and reserved, I had no idea she was so active and outgoing. (Not that it matters- just a surprise. I'm rather introverted.) In Jan (while visiting her in the church nursery where she volunteers) when I asked about her New Year's activities, she mentioned having gone to Milwaukee for a few days. I asked why she goes there and she said to visit friends and her BOYFRIEND lives there.
It's like, thanks a lot. I know you're super sweet and polite, but you could have somehow not led me on by being afraid to say "no" originally. I was, and still am, devastated. I liked her so much and can't get over it. She plans to move away in the fall to attend grad school. Hopefully "out of site" will lead to "out of mind".
Hey
I'm so in the same boat, there is this guy a School and he's perfect, he's an A* straight student, plays the guitar and was in a band, he's witty, funny, suprisingly romantic, and generally a nice person.
In Autumn I took the plunge for the first time, I made sure we were alone, gathered my courage and feeling sickeningly terrorified I told him about my crush on him,
It was the scariest thing I have ever done, he told my qoute ' Well obviously I don't-' then I cut him off before he could finish. As it turned out things weren't arkward, we chatted almost instantly afterwards, and as we meet everyday on the bus stop nothing changed.
It brought a high for awhile, I thought I was getting over him, but my friends, they're little comments like, ' you two have such chemistry !' etc soon made me realise that actually I was nowhere near getting over him.
And today, my friend when she and him shared a lesson, and I wasn't around, asked him what he thought of me and his answer was 'sorry', she asked him if I had ever told him my feelings and he repiled almost instantly, the memory obviously not gone from his mind, Now I guess i'm worried what he's thinking off me now ?
I don't know what's wrong with me, I mean I've got a mole in the middle of my forehead, which has caused numerous comments, and my hair, unless treated right in it's curly state isn't the smoothest around but does that make me undesirable ?
I'm funny, really quite sarcastic, I'm good with people, I don't know if there's anyone who can give advice or reasurrance I would be most grateful.
I hope this comment doesn't sound too pathetic !!!
I am so amazed at the number of responses I have gotten from this entry. Thank you to you all who shared your stories. I hope that you will get to a point in your life where the want is no longer there and can move on with your life. Peace to all
m.a.
Sorry folks. I 46 yr and getting over someone doesn't get any easier with age. Best thing to do is distract yourself and/or focus on other things plus get real as what the other person thinks about you. Props for taking the risk and devulging your feelings though. if you don't risk it, you will never know. I think there is a fine line there, as you don't want to creep them out. I mean if you work with them or have another relationship besides friend then you have to really be careful. Heck, most people know when someone else likes them. Why? They show it. Good luck people.
well getting over your crush is easy all you do is, be more flirtatious with other guys, that will keep u busy in the process of healin
Yeah, empathy all around here. I’ve had a crush on the same guy for going on two years now. He's a neighbor and, unfortunately, I see him only about every two to three months, just often enough to reignite the flame so to speak. Even though other guys have asked me out I still can't get him out of my head. Even, hell especially, when on the dates. He’s really freaking attractive and that really doesn't help, but what's almost worse is that he's kind and sensitive and respectful and mature and NOT INTERESTED. Yup, that last one is definitely his least attractive characteristic. The only thing that I can think of to help douse those pesky flames is absence. And not the absence makes that heart grow fonder kind, but rather the out of sight out of mind type. I really have got to stop seeing him.
i have to say this doesn't seem to me to be a how to blog as much as a yeah, me too, want to hear my story? blog. just saying. maybe a title change would be in order?
I need help myself.I understand that my crush is my way of focusing on fantasy Vs. my very lonely and sad marriage. I unfortunately have to see my crush once a month because he is my physician. He is married and I would never do anything inappropriate. In the fantasy world, I end my sad marriage, he ends his for another reason and we become sweethearts and i am finally in a loving relationship. In the real world, he probably thinks I am a pain in the ass and I will never let him know that I care about him ( he probably already knows.) It sucks being lonely and in this kind of pain. I pray that one day I will find the strength to end my very sad marriage and find true mutual love. I envy people who are in good strong relationships. I never imagined that at 45 I would be crushing over a very middle aged man like a little school girl. I need to give up that glimmer of hope that one day I will be with him because it will never happen.I guess J.Geils was right, love does stink!
i hv hd a crush on da sam3 guy K for about four yearx....i saw him at a audition for da school singin competition...he stood in a corn3r jammin wid his frnx on his guitar..dose dark features...dose eyes...i fell for him at once....
da next day i found out dat h3 wx a gud frnd of ma frndx sister..it wx only nervous glances....nuffing else i wx too cowardly 2 mak3 a move....he on the other hand was lyk a magnet ...n soo perfect ..A+ grades,long dark hair pls he wx a guitarist..sum ov ma frndx told me he liked me...n dat nyt i sang da loudest i hv ever sung in da bathroom...i couldnt stop dreamin abt him....if i eva caught hx eye i wud jst melt n turn 2 mush....buh den every1 told me dat he wx toO cool 4 me.....
2 yrx passed n v hd 2 mov3 away...n at
dat last day i discovered dat hix best frn wx.. into m3 not him..
cudnt do nything i jst quitely went away.....
da next 1 year wx hell 4 m3...pain i hd neva expepienced...wot hurt da most was dat he ddnt even noe he wx hurtin me soo much...he wx causin me soo much pain.....buh da hole nxt year i wrkd on me ...so dt iv v eva mt again i wud b worth him.....
surprisingly next yr v movd bak...buh i hd 2 chang3 ma skool nyhow i went 2 meet ma old teacherx..n frnx n ...dere he wx ..in frnt ov...lookin at m3...
h3 ddnt quit3 look lyk dat god-typ thing dat i hd bin imaginin hm as...buh i loved him....
n i wnted 2 shout out loud dat hey v r soo close yet y r v still so far....i cudnt spk again....so he ddnt no3....
lyf began again i gt ma eyes on a new lad...he was also interested ..buh den K crept in ma mind n i pushed da new lad away....soon after i brok3 wid my best frn....now i hv nothin...
k duznt no3 i luv him...n i cant tell him now because i hv heard dat hje ix not inteested in ma typ ov galz...h3 goes 4 wot i used 2 b 3 yrx ago...wot shud i dooo..????
i know how you feel.
he's 15, and i'm 12. He's with another girl. He's got straight A's, he sings, he's funny, he's cute and a really sweet guy.
I've known him since i was 7, he's my cousin's best friend, and i only meet him once a year, otherwise i just talk to him on MSN. Or over email. He flirts with me all the time.
I don't know if it's love, but i think it is. thinking about him makes me cry.
i can't say anything to him, even if he doesn't like me, i just want to get it out there, so i feel better, i just want closure.
yeah...buh atleast this guy flirts wid you....my crush has never ever even looked at me...he probably doesnt even know i exist.....
AND i M one of THE moST popular GALS here......ughhhhhhhhh
I completely understand. I have a crush on a guy with whom I seemingly have chemistry. But I am not forward and will probably never tell him. I think when you like someone or they like you, it is obvious. (It is obvious to others! Very!)
Why does having a crush have to be so hard? Gotta start looking for the bad things about him. I took the first step in the right direction today...I deleted the voicemails he sent me. For me this is a feat.
I know all too well what each of you's are going through!! i have had a crush on a guy named peter for about 4 years. i have a boyfriend right now of 2 years and even with my boyfriend, i still think about him. not as much, but i do. I love my boyfriend soo much, but there is still a part of me that wonders/wishes me and peter could be together. He never outwardly rejected me, but i guess not answering my e-mail is a rejection. But i never told him that i liked him in the e-mail, i just asked how he was doing and he never replied. you can always think of excuses like, he never got it or i never got his response. but u have to realize the truth. he did get my e-mail, he just wasnt bothered enough to respond. i have tried numerous ways to try and get over him like pretending that i didnt like him by giving him evil looks or just ignoring him or telling everyone i didnt. i knew i was better than that, falling for a guy i could never have. but soemthing about him just stuck with me. My plan is to find my rejection. i will tell him that i like him and i will wait for his response, that he doesnt like me back. and then i can love my boyfriend will ALL my heart, not just a part of it. he has taken away too much of my life, and this crush is gonna stop once and for all so i can live my life with a free mind.
ADVICE FOR PEOPLE WHO ARE HAVING A HARD TIME DEALING WITH A CRUSH:
1. Acknowledge you have a crush
2. Do not let the crush drag on for weeks, months, even years. Tell people you have a crush and who it is, after a while tell the person. If he/she agrees with you, than great. If not, why would you want a girl/guy who doesnt want you?
3. You are better than that!!! YOU ARE AN INDEPENDENT, BEAUTIFUL PERSON!! CRY FOR A FEW DAYS AND SAY ALRIGHT THERE IS A BETTER GUY/GIRL OUT THERE FOR ME!!
4. Do not overthink. Concentrate on other things.
OVERALL, THAT PERSON WHO REJECTED YOU, IS MISSING OUT!!!! YOUR HEART BELONGS TO SOMEONE WHO ACTUALLY WANTS IT! A HEART IS NOT A PLAY THING, GIVE IT TO SOMEONE WHO DESERVES IT! BE PICKY ABOUT WHO YOU GIVE IT TO. LIFE IS ABOUT ACHIEVING YOUR GOALS, BEING HAPPY, AND BECOMING THE BEST PERSON YOU CAN BE!! THIS PERSON YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON, WON"T MAKE YOU HAPPY IF THEY REJECTED YOU. A MAN/WOMEN WHO WANTS YOU'RE HEART AND SOUL IS THE ONE FOR YOU! THE ONE WHO WILL MAKE YOU HAPPY!! LASTLY, THESE LAST WORDS ARE THE TRUTH, NO JOKING INVOLVED. EACH ONE OF YOU: THIS TOO SHALL PASS.GOD IS WITH YOU. YOUR LIFE IS LIKE A DIAMOND. YOU WILL FIND THE ONE. WHO EVER SAID LIFE WAS EASY? YOU WILL FIND HIM OR HER AND HAVE A FAMILY, GET MARRIED AND LIVE A BEAUTIFUL LIFE. THE ONE WHO REJECTED YOU, IS NOT YOU'RE ONE. YOU'RE OKAY.
Reading all your posts helps alot.. Knowing that i'm not the only one with an impossible crush. I fell for my best friends girlfriend and tried so hard not to. But since we really don't choose who we fall for i couldn't help myself.. They broke up ages ago (due to my friend treating her like sh*t) but i couldn't tell her how i felt since it was my best friends gf and his first gf ever. this is over a year ago and i still feel like a moron for having a crush on her. i would go out and find a new girl but i keep comparing girls to her and no one can get even close.. anyone know a good cheap place for a lobotomy? feels like it's my only option at this point.. 'Richie Sambora - Father Time' anyone?
You should give yourself credit as you have an awesome sense of humor! This goes out to the person who wrote about a lobotomy being their only alternative. I really know what you mean. I also can relate to feeling "stupid" or out of control for having a crush for so long. We have to stop beating ourselves up on top of it all. I makes me feel better to know that you have all had the problem too..and I certainly don't think that any of you are stupid. You sound like, caring, thoughtful and articulate people to me.
I've been infatuated with a man 10 years older than me for a year now. He admitted to me about 6 months ago that he was interested as well...But I'm with an amazing man that I love...I really fell for this other person despite myself...I guess the routine of my 14 year relationship took its toll. So now I feel that, as I love my boyfriend and want to stay with him...I have to get over this other guy.
It's easier said than done though...I can't even hear his name without feeling a jolt..and I've beat myself about this too...I feel that I too need the aforementioned lobotomy...Thank you all for your posts...I copied and pasted some quotes that inspired me and I hope with all my heart to get past this. I want to enjoy my life again and not to be living in some virtual existence with a man I'm not even with!
I wish you all peace with this and happiness in your lives!
I met a man on business travel and in the span of about 7 hours I fell in love and can't get him out of my mind. I sent him a little note (snail mail) after the conference and told him he's brilliant and kind and thanking him for his time. That's all I plan to do towards keeping this open b/c we're both married. But I'm such a wreck! It's been a week and he's all I can think about! I wish I hadn't kissed him, I wish I hadn't fallen in love with him. I feel so different now and so sorry and so sad. I do feel rejected because he's not chasing me and calling me, you know, and I could have saved myself such heartache and the embarrassment of the aftermath if only I would have kept my maidenhead about me. Take it from me: cheating kills. I'll take that lobotomy now...
I feel for you.
Awhile ago I realized I had, had a crush on a friend for about a year. I started noticing that he often stared at me in our classes, and he'd smile and wave if I caught his eye. I decided I'd finally let him know before summer started and I did, but he said he only liked me as a friend. I completely understood and figured we could still be friends- slightly awkward ones. All this summer he never said anything to me. I'm not sure were we go from there, friends or no friends. I've gotten over him, but the fear that he'll bring it up every chance he gets scares me. How do I handle that?
I've had a crush on a guy for over a year. I think if I avoided seeing him - which is pretty easily done - I could get over him but its just too tempting and I end up torturing myself again. I'm ever hopeful and I enjoy indulging in the fantasy. I know my idea of him isn't real and I'm all too willing to interpret every little encounter with him in a positive light. On the other hand I'm quite good at not showing that I like him so even if he does like me I haven't given him too many signals. I admire all you people who've had the courage to state your feelings and then find out if the person likes you. Why is it when you know exactly what you're doing its still hard to do any differently. I think I'm pretty lazy and I prefer to indulge in this fantasy instead of getting on with my life. Pretty sad! I hope I can do whats best for me soon.
OMG! i just found this site suited for me. I also have this crush for almost 4 yrs. we've been friends for almost 5 years.This is the story. We're classmates since 1st and 2nd yr highschool and then when we're 2nd yr HS, my friends told me that this guy has crush on me? i was shocked! After it, i didn't noticed that i have a crush on him also, i tried to ignore it because i heard rumors that says he's just using me because his crush is really my bestfriend. I cried with i heard that but that's life. I tried to get over him but i can't. We're really close, we texted each other and we're like bestfriends and after the school year ends, he gave me a letter.. it says there that he feels sorry for everything he did to me and hus planning out to court me and he didn't court me because he was sure that i'll reject him, that's the main point in the letter. so i just knew that his feelings is really true and he really has a crush to me, which he doesn't know that i had a crush n him too. I tried to forget him. For almost 2 yrs, we haven't see each other because he transferred from other school. BUT now, we're college. We're in the same school and we both have the same course but we're not blockmates. I was really shocked because i didn't expected that we'll really see each other there.. and my feelings are coming back again.. He always do a favor to me which i don't like because i think he just took advantage with my feelings. it sucks! pls help me to get over him! pls do. thanks!
this is the situation i'm in now and I think i just have to toughen up and delete his texts (replying to mine because he doesn't text me first), and his voicemail (he did call me once outta the blue and i still keep it 4 weeks later nerd that i am) and maybe even the few pics we have together...i met him at a work function, he had flown in from another city to attend, we connected, were attracted and yes we freaked out in his hotel room the whole week he was here....but he said he doesn't want a long-distance relationship but for us to be frinds and see where that leads....and now i am obsessed with him since he left, googling him, reading his bio online, and even booked a ticket next week to spend 4 days with him (he said it would be fine and he's looking forward to it, etc.) but i know that i like him a HELLUVA lot more then he likes me.....
i am hoping that i will see him, spend a lot of time with him and promptly see his faults that i did not see while he was in my city... and get him out of my system.
but i know the converse can happen, that i will fall even deeper in over my head.
the only way to get over a crush as i see it is this:
BE COOL!!! Develop an ego, a GIGANTIC ego, hyper inflate your ego and find your crush's faults and MAGNIFY them, pick them apart, I mean, this dude has back acne, that's kind of gross. plus he is in his late twenties and doesn't own a house yet...plus his teeth aren't perfect like mine. and i have way more friends on facebook...as superficial as this stuff sounds, i am thinking its the only way i will get over the fact that he has an amazing sense of humour, is well-educated, has a great job and is sexy as HELL, tall ,dark and handsome....
okay okay
back to the ego....
i need to inflate mine and downplay his....
anyways these are the thoughts that ramble through my brain where my crush is concerned...hopefully it helped someone but it probably didn't!!! i am just as confused as lovesick as you all are...
time would be a great cure-all if it just didn't take so damm long to work!!
I've had a huge crush on a girl in class. Its been 3 months since college started and I met her. She is the most beautiful, friendly and interesting girl I've ever met. At first I became good friends with her. She needed my help in coursework often, and I was always more than willing to provide it. She gradually stopped asking for my help however, but I continued to keep helping her. I worried more about her and her grades than she did. When she couldn't do without my help, she used to come to me, and I would help her. After that, she would hardly talk to me when she didn't need me, nor would she ever acknowledge or appreciate anything I did for her. I got really frustrated and confused. Finally, over the phone, told her that I've started liking her a lot, which is why I've been obsessively caring for her, and would like to know how she felt. She replied that she was already committed. My whole world crashed. I told her that that was fine, and there wasn't anything I or she could do about it. This happened a couple of weeks back. The next night I got drunk and sent her messages describing the depth of my feelings for her. I asked her why she didn't tell me she was unavailable earlier, and couldn't she make it that I was crazy about her. I also told her how I felt a bit used. I don't know why but she's refused to talk to me since. I've even apologized, though I don't think I ever said anything nasty to her. I thought being friends with her would make me feel better, because I really miss her company. Maybe its better that I stay away from her, but I just can't seem to get over the deep, almost physical pain that I feel. I can't seem to get her out of my head, and am unable to focus on other important things in my life. I just hope things get back to normal. I can't really avoid her, as she's in my class for two more years. Whenever I see her with other guys, the pain becomes all the more unbearable.
I understand completely. I'm in the same predicament you were in, and it's been driving me close to insane.
I'm a freshman in high school and the guy I like is a sophomore, but that's something I can live with. After all, I've been telling myself, lots of people date people within a few years' age range. But anyway, this is the first time I've felt so, so strongly about a person. My attraction to him makes me tongue-tied just thinking about him; he keeps me up at night and throughout my day, the most obscure things remind me of him. All of my friends (and some people who aren't even that close to me) say that he and I would make the perfect couple, and I believe them. We have everything in common and he is the most beautiful person in the world to me. I would swim across an ocean for his love (however cliche that may sound).
But I've been noticing some things, and, well... I think he and a sophomore girl might be developing a relationship. I don't know this for a fact, and not knowing just makes the situation so much worse for me. Because if I knew that they had something, maybe I'd give up. But right now, I'll do anything to be with him.
I just feel so bad liking him. He is the nicest and most polite guy I have ever had the pleasure to know. Not even having known me in person, he talked to me on Facebook the night before high school and told me everything I needed to know about it because he didn't want me to be nervous. That first day, I wasn't anxious at all. And still, although it turns out he's in my Algebra class, we haven't talked besides saying "hi" in the halls. We're both really shy.
And I don't know if he likes me or this other girl. He's always looking at me, and I always feel his gaze. He's extremely nice to me, and...
It's all so confusing. I don't want to ask because I fear imminent rejection.
I know this is an old thing, but... gosh. This is the story of my life. :\ I got my first crush in first grade and now, 16 years later, things are still the same. :(
It is hard no matter what your age. I had crushes when I was younger and it hurt when nothing happened. Just recently, I had a crush on a guy at work. He would come into my area to drop off paperwork to my boss. I noticed him looking at me a few times and he would go out of his way to walk past my desk. And I noticed when he was talking to the women that sit near me he was looking at me the whole time. It gave me a bad case of butterflies. So I thought maybe he was interested in me. Well, it was not to be. Today was his last day as he was retiring. He came through my area thanking everyone for everything. I thought I was going to die. Once again I was wrong. Trust me, it doesn't hurt any less when you are older than when you are young. Maybe God is just telling me there isn't any man out there for me and the sooner I accept it the better.
I know how you feel. i've had a crush on the same guy for 2 years! i am trying to get over him and my friends are helping me but also my friend, sammie talks to him a lot and she says he might like me. he might like me but still he likes this other girl. I think about him, dream about him and i see his name everywhere, literally. i love him but i must get over him. i wish i could help but i am in the same situation you are. i don't know if you are religious or not but if you are then the only advice i can give you is to pray. that's what i've been doing. Good luck.
Some of the above situations are so like mine.
I cant believe im writing in a blog thingy, never did it before, but here goes...
I've fallen for a guy in my physics class in college, and he's gorgeous! he's funny and kind, in a band (thats not the main reason like him tho!!) he's a genuine kind of guy and he's SINGLE. But there isnt a hope in hell of him liking me. I'm really shy and the one time i was talking to him i probably came across as a bit weird. I just want to get over him as quickly as possible without having to tell him my feelings..that would be too humiliating, id probably have to leave the country id be soo embarrassed. Cos i know hed reject me, its not like im ugly or anything but iv never had a boyfriend before, iv never even kissed a guy and im 19, and i just dont know how to talk to guys.. why im doing physics i dont know when its mostly guys who do it!
any ideas???
I'm going through the same thing right now, 10 months and counting. I've spoken to this guy only a couple of times and I've fallen for him. He was in my college and graduated a few months back, so he's moved away, got a job etc. I know that I've idealized him but i cant help myself. He really is sweet, kind and such a genuinely nice guy. But i'm so sure that he doesn't have the same feelings for me. He's probably going to be around this weekend, which means that I'm gonna meet him/ bump into him. I'm really dreading that. I am planning to avoid him but i dont think that'll be cool. And maybe i do want to see him, there's still this hope that he'll have feelings for me. maybe, if i meet him I'll realize that I'm probably over him. I've had crushes in the past but they've never lasted this long. it is hampering my work. With past experience, its usually something about that person that i dont like that helps me get over a crush. But somehow for this guy i really dont want to find that reason. Man, I really need help!
Ok i know this is supposed to be a how-to-get-over blog post, so I'll surely post a solution when i find one. Let's just see how this weekend goes.
I just stumbled across this this morning and read alot of the entries and It made me feel so much better knowing that im not alone.
I know this guy for about a year now. We met online and became friends as we related on some of our ideals.
At first i just thought of him as a friend but then shortly after knowing him found myself completely attracted to him. I was always thinking about him. Things were always reminding me of him.
When wed hang out and watch movies id so want him to scoot closer and make an attempt to kiss me or hold me or touch me, hell even some dirty thoughts went through my mind.
Well getting with the facts. He said he was only looking for friends. But in my mind i thought ok maybe he'll come around eventually and something might happen. As things he would say to me crossed a line. For example I had told him about a date I had. And he said that I should not show his pic to my future date as he might get jealous. Im like what do you mean?? hes like well face it no one will be as good for you as I am and no one ever will be.
That just floored me. I stopped talking to him for a few months after that as im like ok i need to get over him that and his comment really messed with my head alot.
We started talking again and I had mentioned that hurt me. He had apologized and claimed it to be nothing more than kidding around. Jumping back a bit.. before he made that comment i verbally expressed my feelings to him a few months prior which he didnt say anything about. Hes made sexual innuendos towards me.
He tells me and others that he wants to remain celibate for now and hes not seeking relationships. However I ran across him on a singles site of which hes posting body pics of himself. So im like ok its just me then I must repulse him in some way.. Needless to say once I found the personals add I was angry and told him off. About some the flirting/jokes he does and how it messes with me and hurts me. He didnt respond well to that basically told me to F-off. He basically denied ever saying or doing anything to me that would lead me on. I disagree but oh well.
We talked it out and I guess we are friends now. I rarely ever see him so I think that will be good. I think time will help me forget the feelings i have for him and move on. Just SOOO tired of being rejected. and I dont know why as im very attractive and always told so by lots of people just not the right ones. Im trying to keep my faith that I will meet a guy that Im attracted to and that I have feelings for and that he will also feel the same way about me.
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Ive had 2 crushes in the past 2 years. Of which they have been VERY consuming and like a fool I let it rule my life.
Ive done ALOT of internet searching to find others who I can relate to on this subject and was suprised there were alot of people going through the same thing I was. Below Ive made some steps to follow for people going through the same thing I am. And this does help trust me.
#1 You need to spend time away from your crush- Avoid Him/her at all costs if you can. I know that sounds mean or anti-social. Ask yourself this question "Which is easier to deal with being thought of as an antisocial person? or Having your heart crushed daily by being around the person you desire but cant have?" personally Id go with option 1. My first crush was a guy I worked with and had to see him daily. Once he found out how i felt he distanced himself from me and it made me feel even worse not to mention it impuned my work. My 2nd crush was a friend of which I dont see much and dont plan to until I get over him.
#2 Make a pro/cons list of the person you are crushing on. Base the list from facts you know about them like personality traits, likes dislikes etc..
You want the person.. You want to be their lover.. you want to be in a loving relationship with them.
Well make a list for yourself listing qualities YOU want a person to have not what your crush has. List what you expect from a romance. Then make a list of pro/cons about your Crush. Then compare your expectations list to your crushes pro cons list and see if they match up. You might be surprised they dont. As it is 100% fact that you build up your crush so much in your head that they are almost god like status and completely infallible and they have immense power over you, basically having you fall over yourself to get to them. Putting their needs before yours. I think once you see the proof on paper you'll find that they are just not right for you.
#3 Keep your emotions in check but dont stash them away either. All though this step is the HARDEST because this step is what got you in trouble in the first place.
Among my searches one thing ive heard is to not hate the person or be angry at them for rejecting you.You know what? thats complete BS!! Yes you can be angry at them for passing up a catch like yourself. Yes you can hate them for making you feel worthless or undesirable as thats just not true, You are desireable and you are a catch. But dont be so angry or hate them so much where you will go out of your way to do harm to them or wish them harm or that matter cause yourself to be more consumed by them.. Be realistic, be able to indentify with your feelings and work through them whatever they may be: Hate, love, sadness. All very powerful emotions. Alot of people say "I still want to be friends with them" when the fact being is they cant handle it. People only say that because its the right /nice thing to say or do.If you can handle being friends with your crush and seeing them with someone else than more power to you. In my crushes I found that hating the person is very healthy and normal. It helps me ditch the warm fuzzies I have for my crush and helps me move on. Heck sometimes I pretend im talking to them and completely rip them a new one. Believe me it does help. But do this when you are alone and away from people. You dont want other people to think you are crazy. Bottom line emotions are emotions. They are untamed, can be consuming and are an element we all possess as human beings, its what makes us human. So you are never wrong in how YOU feel dont let anyone tell you otherwise or make you feel bad for how you feel.
#4 Confide about your feelings to a VERY trusted friend. When I say this I mean a friend youd consider like a brother or sister. Get their feedback from the situation. Hearing feedback from others can sometimes alter your viewpoint and help you see things you couldnt see before. I cannot tell you how many times my friends have pointed out to me that my crush is just not right for me, that I deserve better or our interests clash as mentioned in step 2. Although it hurts to hear because you have your sights set on that one guy/gal, but sometimes we need a nice friendly dose of reality from ones who care about us. Keep in mind Crushes and romances come and go but true friends and family are eternal. So before you despair count your blessings to have those special people in your life. Keep faith that you WILL meet that one person you are meant to be with.
#5 Lastly try not to overthink on the person or the rejection. Ive been through this ALOT in the past 2 years. Just when I think I got the last of the nasty left over emotions scattered about by my crush.. the paint peels and oops out pops that nasty emotion that makes me feel like crap. I then find myself thinking negative thoughts about myself or beating myself up. Lately Ive found the best way to get past these feelings is to just verbally tell yourself to shut up or to let it go. Then literally break out into a song. I know that sounds crazy but a recent article ive read about inner happiness stated that if you are a person who has to complain constantly about one little thing that bothers you that doing that magically opens a floodgate of negative emotions. Think of a snowball rolling down hill,small at first but then as it rolls it gets bigger and bigger. So if someone yelled at you or said something mean you will later find yourself ranting and complaining about it and then soon you find yourself ranting about something completely different that has nothing to do with the initial thing that upset you which in turn makes you feel like crap overall. When you find yourself doing this literally stop yourself and start singing your fav song, recite a poem.. do ANYTHING to get your mind off of whats bothering you. Also in the article they said that the initial onslaugts of anger in the brain only lasts for like 1.5 mins. So if you can distract your mind for 1.5 minutes you will be better off and then forget what made you angry.
I hope that my experiences and suggestions above help the many who suffer from unrequited love.
Hang in there you will be ok..
This weekend was a bit of mixed emotions but ended with me feeling terrible upset.
@ the person above me
Thanks a ton!
you're suggestion make a lot of sense... and it just might work. :D
this guy is a mini bi polar or something! first he likes me for about a month, then it stops for about 3 weeks, he gets a girlfriend, and then they break up and a week later he likes me again for a week and then he gets over it... just like that... i've turned down so many ppl down for him. he has caused so much pain... but the thing is ...if i cant have him, i dont want anyone else...he's also terribly self absorbed.... my friends say i could do so much better, since hes not a good looking person, but i like him SO MUCH!! i wish i had never ever met him, i just want him to get out of my life so i can get over him,...but then again i wouldnt be able to stand it if he wasnt (in my life)
you are lucky. you might think im crazy to say that but its true. at least you have a crush on someone nice, sweet and intellegent.ive had a crush on the meanest guy you can possibly know. he wasnt like that to me until some one told him how i felt. he's from church o he told evryone from church that i liked him. he gave and still gives me mean faces. ive had a crush on him for 4 or 3 years. i hate him but he's going to pay for what he did.
I just want to say to all the bloggers out there…you will get over it! Some of you have been holding onto your crushes for years and have only hurt yourself in the process. Trust me I’m not preaching, but I am someone who is in the same boat (kinda) although my crush and I actually hooked up. I still am very into this guy, but I can’t let my feelings overrule my common sense anymore. You wanna know the crazy thing? I don’t hate him, I’m not even mad at him, he has his reasons for not being into me, just as I had my reasons for not liking someone who liked me; just like you had your reasons for not liking someone who liked you.
Some of you out there sound like great catches and if you open your eyes wide enough to see that, trust me you’d wonder why you’ve been crushing on someone who doesn’t appreciate all your wonderfulness…why waste your time on someone who doesn’t even notice you?! It’s def a process I’m not claiming that it’s easy I still slip into fantasy land and think about him (naked, lol), but I’ve placed those thoughts where they belong…in fantasy land!
Something that helped me (although it’s been hard) if he calls I don’t answer, if he sends a text, I don’t respond (even if he is saying nice things I wanna hear) If I see him I keep it to a brief hello and remark how busy I am and keep it moving. Time, distance, a good dose of self-esteem, and loving/patient friends does the trick every time :-) Good luck guys and hang in there…
I have a crush on a guy I've become friends with over the internet. He's half a world away. I'm a huge dork. We chat practically daily for hours on end about everything. And I know if I want to stop crushing, I should stop chatting but damn it, I can't. This has been going on for 4 months now and I'm ready to be over the crush but I can't seem to stop thinking about him. I mean how is it I'm crushing on someone who doesn't exist in my real world? I guess I'm gonna have to act like a big girl and stop talking to him. I don't want to fall for someone I can't be with and I can SO feel myself on the edge of falling. Talk about LOSER.
To everyone, perhaps the reason for a "crush" is BECAUSE that person is so unavailable, and BECAUSE that person manifests traits we admire, if he/she was available, we would not feel the same, All of us have someone in our lives who loves us and is available, and since we know them, we know their flaws, they are not half as appealing. The flaws of the unavailable ones are easier to overlook. To the one in the loveless marriage, its a stone cold scene if you are single, with no guarantees even to "hook up" much less get into any kind of relationship one would want to be in. To the young ones, it does not get better with age and "wisdom" I am a divorcee infatuated with someone half my age, who reminds my of my ex husband. I remember when I got someone this hot, and I remember bitterly regretting getting him, and it does not help one bit.
This is still the same anonymous as above, to the person who posted the original blog, I would say don't try to be friends, don't try to be sweet, realize that this person manifests traits that you admire, and and cultivate them in yourself and take all of the emotional energy and try to channel it and FLIRT FLIRT FLIRT with other guys
I tottaly understand this. I guess it's hard to let go at times because.. they do those small things ..that make you wonder what the hell the person is thinking... they say they only like you as a friend and then completely show a different side the next. It's really painful. Expecially when everytime they have a great achievement of some sort.. you feel somewhat jealous and proud at the same time for no reason at all.
I stumbled upon this site and I am shocked at how many people have had crushes that they can't get over. I thought I was the only one. Long story short, there was a guy I kinda dated in the beginning of college. We hung out a few times, but I was way too busy then and we kinda went our separate ways. I was told that he really liked me though and his actions showed it. Throughout the last couple of years, I haven't been able to get over him though. It's the oddest thing because despite developing new crushes and having new flings with different boys, he's the only boy I can't get out of my head. I've bumped into him a few times here and there throughout the last couple of years and he was in my class at one point. I don't know what to make of him. He is currently single and has been for a while from my knowledge. He's super good looking and I honestly can see myself marrying him. I know that's crazy to say but there is just some kind of crazy attraction that draws me to him. I decided to chat with him on an online social site a few weeks ago. I hadn't talked to him in months. We chatted for a long time and then he brought up how he would love to see me when I am back in town. A friend of mine bumped into him when I did get into town and she told me that he kept asking about me. However, the next day when our groups of friends hung out, he seemed nice/excited to see me yet also a bit standoffish. I didn't know what to make of it, and I still don't. I'm a very rational person and a part of me does believe that he still likes me. There are just too many clues that point in that direction. However, other clues point in the other direction as well. He is a shy guy but still, I don't know. I really hope that I see him again soon. In the meantime, it's hard for me to stop thinking/analyzing that night and what his true feelings for me are. Any advice?
I REALLY can relate to you. I've had 8 years of crushing on this guy. You can call me dramtic, but this is how it really was. We couldn't be togther because i was the "popular girl" and he was "under dog" boy. It's all stupid after i thought about it a week ago. I thought " I really DID love this boy, insanly, I almost thought about suicide, because he hurt me so much, but i thought i'm not going to waste my time when i could be doing something better, like talking to him. I havn't yet. But i do know that everything will be alright. Hey, everyone thinks "I wish i never meet this person", buy you did, which is really good cuz you could have never met them. So why can't you try to be positive and be friends with this person, trust me. It'll be worth it!
There are so many anonymous ones on here, this is the anonymous that talked about the crush on someone half my age, there is no point in trying to be friends, why? Like cats and dogs, sales and admin, republicans and democrats, the aims are different, if one if hoping for a romantic/ sexual reaction, and the other is just hoping "if they are hoping or have noticed anything" that the person with the crush does not let it get out of control, COMEON, there is no common ground it is already out of control, deal with it
True to form, this is the same anonymous that posted the above, when you can see yourself as either a joke or a fool if you look through the other person's eyes, THERE IS NO FRIENDSHIP, all of us have enough self respect to keep breathing, totally understand why I'm not your type, wish it was different, and I'm still going to try to manage my emotions, Yes we can all do that, emotions stem from thoughts which can be changed. FRIENDS??? I DON"T THINK SO, it's called false hope
i was/still am crushing on a boy i told him on facebook he was really cool with it at first but then i got the impression that he thought i was werid for liking him well any way i still like him but i dnt think were going 2 b together anytime soon
I really do know how you feel. This year has been the worst it has happended to me 3 times already...it's horrible. My senior year of high school i developed a crush on one of my friends i had known since 6th grade. A lot of things happened and he ended up hearing from a friend of mine...who also liked him and was very jealous of our friendship...that I was obsessed with him. He has yet to speak to me and it sitll hurts. Then I met this guy my freshman year of college. We never seemed to sleep so we would stay up and hang out all night. He knew everything about me and we became really good friends. Towards the end of the semester I decided to tell him I like him because he always said it was flattering to hear a girl likes him. It was horrible listening to him tell me he wants to go on a date and asking ME who he should go on a date with. So I told him...kind of. I told him that i liked someone and so forth and ended up telling him I chickened out when he asked who it was. Then i finally told him it was him. He ended up moving out because he couldn't afford it anymore...it was so horrible. We rarely talk now. Then this other friend...he was down there with me and the other guy a lot and i was always real comfortable with him as well. We weren't as close until this semester...that's when i realized i liked him. I felt bad because while i was pining over my friend who didn't like me...i could have been building something with my other friend. Well now I told him over IM and it was horrible. He lives in my dorm and we have all the same friends and we ended up not talking for one day. He showed up the next day to my room and everything was back to normal. It seems weird...me and him are closer it seems like even though he told me he likes me just as a friend. He tells me everything and I am there to help him. It makes it really hard to NOT like him. He is there and I am here...our friendship is really strong and it is so hard to get over him. He is an amazing guy and has little experience with relationships as do I. I just have to let time run it's course and be there for him like I always will be. I will probably never fully get over the last one...he is a great guy and all I can do is hope for the best for him. If him not wanting me and wanting me JUST as a friend makes him happy...than I guess that makes me happy...even though it does hurt.
I hear u guys!! I've had a crush on this guy for 7 YEARS!!! He is a friend of my family and I've known him all my life. We are practically family. He's 3 years older then me. As much as I'd like to call him a jerk- he's not. He's sweet, funny, cute, smart,... And when I'm around him- those warm, fluttery, happy feelings fill me up. Yes, he has flaws, but I know someday, he'll make someone really happy. I can't tell him how I feel because it'd be too awkward. Also- to complicate things worse- I think he likes my older sister. I'd never tell her because if they both like each other, who am I to stop them. I love my sister n I want her to be happy. I don't know if the guy likes me. Sometimes he looks at me in an intimate way, or he'll hug me tighter then usual. He also has done some sweet things for me but I don't know how to interpret them. I see him every few months, and I thought I was over him, but I don't think I am. These feelings are back again and I feel like
A weak fool. I keep analyzing every text, everything he says, and I go crazy wondering what he's thinking. He's a great guy, and we both have SO much in common!!! It's almost scary. It kills me to think That he may like my sister or that he might have a girlfriend. Distance helps.... But I still think about him. What am I supposed to do??? I'm not in a position in life where I can go meet other guys. I'm going off to college soon and I hope either this guy and I get together, or I move on and find a better guy! All I can say is, try and distract yourself with family, school, and friends... You'll move on when the the time is right... :( totally love sick....
I know how it feels to have a crush on someone, i had a crush on this guy who lives a few blocks away from where i stay(i used to see him and even greet him).In december i went back to my home town for holidays,and when i came back i find out that he had left for another town, i was devastated, however he came back in March and for a few weeks i didn't talk to him( i pretended to be angry @ him) We started talking again after i met him at the Bus stop this other day.We started seeing each everyday until i couldnt hide what/how i was feeling inside anymore. I asked him how he realy felt about me and he told me that he loved me( i only realised now that he told me what i needed to hear) I did a very stupid thing that i still regret even today, i asked him if we could go to his place so we can talk about the new developments of things between us. when we got there we did talk but ended up having sex..... after that i went home and i struggled to get through the day as i was thinking about him a lot. A few days ago he sat me down and told me that he didnt feel the same way about me/he didnt have enough love for me to can have a serious relationship with me as he has a girlfriend that he loves and cant live without. Its a sad situation and i feel stupid 4 allowing myself to fall for him and for sleeping with him. I am planning to get over him and find someone who will love me for real.This stupid infatuation will only hurt me in the end.
I thought crushes were only for teenagers. I'm 32 and have had a crush on a guy for 3 years. Funny thing is, I'm too good for him. I don't mean to sound conceited, but I am. I have flown to see him a few times but he has never come to visit me (we live 4 hours apart by car). I thought he would be so easy to get, and he had written me letters that totally led me on and kept me hanging. I'm a bright, strong girl and feel so weak for having this feeling for him. Make a long story, he got a girl pregnant who used to follow his band around all the time. (He tried to hide it from me but I found out.) He was mean to her at first, then ended up being with her. I dropped him and told him to never contact me again. Now I want him to contact me but I refuse to reach out. He would never be with her if there wasn't a baby involved. I feel so crushed and hurt. I would never trap a guy like that. I just wish I could get over him. I don't know why it's so damn hard. It feels helpless and I don't even look at other guys and just want to forget about men altogether. I wish so much they made a pill for it.
I am SO glad I found this blog. I feel like I've been going mad.
I'm old enough to know better, but have developed a huge crush on a guy at work.
Nothing can come of it - we don't even work in the same city. Who am I kidding though? I'd move to where he lives in a heartbeat if I thought we'd get it on.
I was working in his office recently & felt so happy just hanging out with him. Since I've got home I've been terribly depressed.
I'm trying to get him out of my head by dating other guys. Easier said than done though.
Any advice?
Thats the good thing about a crush. I am the anonymous who usually post two posts at a time, have a crush on a guy half my age. I'm totally old enough to know better, but you know what, I haven't felt like a school girl in a long long time. Just see it as a way of being romantic without any of the usual risks, no fuss, no muss, you can run thru all of the probablities in your head, use him mercilessly in your fantasies, and use this crush to size up the "real" guys you are dating. My rule of thumb, if I don't like them 1% of how much I like my crush victim, they are not worth my time. Weeds out a lot of jerks!!!
true to form again, I am the anonymous from above, feelings are not facts, and actually we CAN change our minds. I have "un crushed" and re crushed on this guy. I just try not to show it. That's the hard part!
So I posted on this site a few months ago about a crush that I had met up with one night and he was kinda hot/cold towards me. Well, since that night there have been many developments. I was in town ago a little under two months ago. He invited a few girlfriends and I to his house party. We ended up hooking up. He initiated everything and he was not drunk. I stayed the night and everything, and I left town assuming that he liked me. We then met up a few times at the bars when I was in town a few weeks ago. He was nice but didn't initiate anything physically. The last night out with him, though, we got into a fight. I admitted my feelings for him (although he guessed by that point) and he told me he didn't like me. I was not his type because I wasn't "experienced" enough and too nice. He said he just hooked up with me because he was was drunk which is a lie. After a lot of contemplation, I came to the realization that he hooked up with me because he got angry that his best friend was hooking up with my best friend that night. I think he got jealous. I sent him a couple of messages afterwards and he didn't respond. I would have probably never seen him again either way because we live in different states now but still. A part of me is still hungry for him. I keep replaying my night with him in my head. It felt so right. I know that this is the best ending but I still am in a bit of a funk about it. I still wonder if he was genuine to me about his feelings. The best part was he came home and made a facebook status about how he thinks I feel about him which is just weird in my opinion. I keep wondering what it means. I find it hard to believe someone who doesn't care about someone would do that yet at the same time, maybe he just did it to piss me off. Who knows how he really feels. I hope that one day he comes to realize what he has lost. In the meantime, though, I really need to get over him. He is not worth it.
I am going to reiterate what previous posters have expressed – the complete relief I am feeling right now, knowing that other people go through what I am going through. Logically I know that what I feel is a crush, a common human emotion – albeit at the extreme end of what ‘crush’ can be classified as. But the problem is, it is a STRONG emotion and logic just doesn’t get a look in. So, as I am sure you have all experienced, I have felt adrift, alone and abnormal for obsessing over a boy for four years. On a whim I googled “how to get over a crush” (feeling stupid while doing so) tonight and I am so glad I did.
My story is like a number of others on here. I met him the first year of University, had very few conversations but just felt an incredibly strong magnetism. He’s attractive but not in a traditional way, just… really mysterious and compelling. We have a lot in common by way of interests and he certainly knows who I am. Over the years we have had classes together but I would just observe him (with my friends teasing me by my side). With the torture tool that is facebook, I have had a couple of chats about neutral school topics and -casebook reaction – been inordinately excited. Time, distance, other mini crushes have not dulled this constant for me.
I have never outright told him how I feel but I have given him plenty of chances to reciprocate in expressing an interest in getting to know each other better. Every time I think it will kick start something more and every time I end up checking my inbox nearly hourly for a continuation of our conversation beyond just the superficial. It never happens and I am heart broken.
I am not convinced that what I have read so far has offered a sure fire way to get over someone that you have invested so much of yourself in, because let’s face it, 90% is our own idealized projections. However, what it has done is alerted me to some things I need to address in myself before I can progress.
First and foremost, the biggest hurdle for me is that I don’t WANT to get over him. Destroying the illusion would not be too hard but it’s offered me so much solace over the years, it is nearly inconceivable to depart from it.
However I recently met a nice guy, genuinely good and steady. I could see myself being happy with him. I have never had a boyfriend, simply because I am a bit of a loner and prefer my own company most of the time. So the prospect of this new guy is fairly monumental. But … the feeling doesn’t come close to the reaction I get around my crush. I am SO angry at myself for not being able to see past that.
I can’t offer any help to you all but perhaps hearing my story (if you’ve read this far, in which case; well done you!) will help someone else to feel a little less abnormal, alone and helpless.
I live in the same house as my crush...but 1 problem!!...Hes nine years older than me! Hes told me that he likes me and loves my company but cant take it any further because hes scared of what people mite say. I think he only likes me because hes hoping 2 have sex with me which makes me feel horrilbe. Im trying to distance myself from him a bit but i always seem to want his attention. :(
I'm trying SO hard to get over this crush. I've liked him since the first day of spring semester. He walked in the first day in one of my Studio classes (We're both art majors.) and I fell for him. Hard.
We hang out at some of the same places and I finally got the courage to talk to him outside of class. He was so approachable and sweet. I started hanging out with his friends and subsequently with him and it turns out that we have some of the most intimate and strange things in common (for instance, we're the only two people we know our age that doesn't have grandparents.) It's a stupid example, but it's the most generic that I could think of right now.
Anyway, I tried my hand at flirting with him (I suck at flirting. It's something I have never been good at.) and to my surprise it worked! We started to hang out one on one more often, and one night after work I found a beautiful poem on my car from an old poetry book he had signed. I couldn't believe it! It meant so much to me (I still keep it with me almost all the time). I came from a really screwed up relationship a few months before. My ex was very selfish and had a drinking problem. He would humiliate and insult me in front of my friends and almost never did anything romantic without being prompted. So obviously, to be shown such a small but powerful token of affection was foreign to me. I had never been shown admiration that way before, and it just made me fall for him even more. We had a quasi-date the next evening where he cooked for me and we watched a movie. He sent me home with a mix cd full of sweet songs hinting at moving somewhere with our relationship. (Think "First Gear" by the Rapture and "Digital Love" by Daft Punk)
I was excited about it and gave him a cd in return with songs that basically gave him the green light as well, but in the following weeks he didn't call me, or make any effort to hang out with me. That really hurt.
I guess he just lost interest somewhere along the line, but It just kills me that I had him and that he just changed his mind or he decided that I wasn't what he wanted. I ended up calling him after we hung out one day and just asked him point blank if he was still interested at all. He said no, his reason being that he didn't want a relationship even though he liked me. He made it very plain that he thought I was a great person and that I'm someone he really wants to stay friends with. And while I want to be friends with him because of how interesting he is and how easy conversation is between us, I don't know if I can handle that because of how much I still like him.
I feel so pathetic! I keep deluding myself, thinking that he'll come around and want to be in a relationship with me if we just hang out more. I know it won't happen, but I just hope so very much that it does.
I feel like on some level we have to be together. I can't explain it. It's not even wishful thinking. I feel that given our interests and temperaments, we're just supposed to be together. I didn't have this feeling with my ex or anyone else I've dated. We just work on some level.
I feel like a crazy person. When I am being completely honest with myself, I realize that I just need to get over him before I fall for him anymore. I'll have classes with him next semester and I'll be seeing him daily this summer since we'll be living down the street from each other and I'm pretty close with his friends now. It will be hard, but despite my delusions of destined love I think I can do it.
To anyone else going through the hellaciousness that is unrequited love, you know by now that you're not alone. You'll get over this love either by dying of old age or by finding someone else. Somehow you will be granted peace.
Hey have any of you thought about a situation like mine: I started realizing a guy smiling at me and he was super sweet. We started talking to each other and I could tell he liked me so I fell in love with him. Then he had to leave about a month after we met. He said goodbye and I havnt seen him for a week. I can't take this painful grip he has on my heart. I feel like he's taken a piece of my heart with him.
I like my best friend ALOT (wouldn't neccessarily say love since its only highschool but whatever.) He knew when i first started liking him (5years ago) but I convinced everyone that I had gotten over him. Now i'm craving and longing for him, his teasing funny laid-back attitude... Everything. He just says he doesn't want to ruin our friendship. Which kills me because i'm torn between keeping a friendship or finaaly getting him to notice that i'm not just the girl nest door.. Worst part is... I haven't even had my first kiss so i'm craving that along with all this stuff. I wish he'd finally see... maybe our juior/senior year...
k, ive nevr done a blog thing b4, but here ii goes, maybe itll help. i met this guy at my sisters wedding, he goes to her church and is good friends with her husband. they live out of state soo... that sux. ne way, this guy is perfect (or so it seems) hes sweet(everyone says so), cute, plays giutar, sings, christian, cute (did i say that?) he added me on fbook an d now i cant stop looking at his prophile, i fell like a satalker (jk) but accordig to his info we have a lot in common. he likes the same music as me... but he lives like a billion lies away and i dont even know if he likes me. my sister said she could ask her husband to hook us up, but when sh etold him, he said that a lot of girls like him and its not worth it. wth does that mean? i wishi could just get over him. im soo distracted. we hav tlkd but hes nevr tlked to me bymyself ukno? ahhh!! im goin crazy! im way too self conncious to put myself out there and tellhim. wat if he doesnt like me? he prolly doesnt even notice me, im just another girl to him. boys suck. im 17 and hav nevr had a bf, or a kiss, or even a hug frm aguy thts not related to me!!! ahhh!! this is sooo pathetic, and childish. im just finding reasons to like him, i cant even think of anything bad about him! im pathetic,but well.. thts life.. it sux..ill get ovr it eventually rite? lets hope so.
So it's been a few months since I have posted and I just wanted to give an update. It's interesting. I look over my few prior posts and think about far I have come from the first one. From wondering whether my crush actually likes me to hooking up with him and then to realizing how incredibly crazy the whole situation was. However, I still think about him. Not as strongly as before. The old adage about time making things easier and less painful is partially true. When my crush told me that he essentially just wanted me for a hookup, it hurt so badly. For the next two months, I felt like I was in a rut. Just the memory of us hooking up hurt so bad that it literally took my breath away. I thought about it constantly. It was rough. However, now that a few months have passed, it has gotten easier so for all those suffering from unrequited love, I am here to say that it sucks. Even if you and your crush hookup or whatever, that is not the solution to the problem. You will still want him/her. However, unrequited love does get a bit easier with time. I wonder if I will ever truly get over him? Maybe not. However, I am glad to know that there are others in similar situations. What causes these feelings? Is it that the object of our affection is in our mind the "ideal mate" for us? I think so and that is why it is so hard for us to let go. However, we must keep searching.
I so understand your feeling, i am crushing over a guy for 3 long years and i am not even sure if he really knows i exist or not. i am completely confident and cool headed person and my friends tell me that i am an extrovert. but everytime the guy in question is near, talking to some one else or in plain sight i totally become a stupid, my reaction to his presence is rediculous and i would have laughed out loud if it didn't cause me such trauma.
You know what i googled just now? i googled how to get over a crush, thats how badly i want to get over this thing i am tolerating for last 3 years, i have come to a point where i don't want this anymore. i wish there were some potion or enchantation that would save me all the helpless heart ache.
I loved your post. and yeah, unrequited love series is the most cruel form of heart ache i think, or maybe i am overly sensitive....
I was crushing on a girl for over a year now, I knew that she didn't share the same feelings for me, but I was hoping that a trip with our friends would change it all.
Needless to say, it didn't work out, she got with another and I was crushed; mostly my fault, I had some control over the situation.
I was severly deppressed the we got back and the next, to the point I sent a declaration of my crush text to her.
Her reply was it, "Just as I can't change how I feel."
That helped me alot and with that knowledge I felt an emotional release that can only lead me to the path of getting over it.
I've had a crush on someone I have known for 22 years (super pathetic, I know). We went to school together and our brothers are good friends. I have practically met every girlfriend he has ever dated and he's met my now ex-husband. I am now 34 years old and I still get that fluttery feeling when I see him or someone mentions his name. I have never told him how I feel because I am quite sure he doesn't feel the same way about me. He's never shown any interest in me which is why I don't understand why I masochistically still like him. I know that I will forget him when I find the right guy. In the meantime I just try to distract myself with getting on with my life.
I know how you feel too.
I've liked a guy for almost a year now and can't seem to get over it. We used to "like eachother" but then he decided he didn't like me anymore. So, I pretended not to like him anymore either. Now we're close friends and he always tells me who he likes and asks for advice. Then he always asks who I like, to which I say no one. Eveytime.
We get along so well and talk all the time. Now I know I might not be the standard "hot" or anything, but I'm decently thin and thought I was okay looking. I'm tall but only around 5 foot 9 or so. Sometimes guys are just too confusing.
I just started grad school and so our class is pretty small. At first I didnt notice him and then it happened...I became very interested. I was planning on just flirting and having a little fun, since im in a relationship. But what happened was a total backfire and now im suffering as a result. On the weekend there was a huge grad school party and i "kind of" hooked up with him. I could not control myself, I wanted to be near him. We slept on the same bed, but nothing happened...he didnt even kiss me. Oh well. Next day i went home. He didnt do anything to follow up and now im ignored by him and he's going after a few other girls. This is mental, because i now am infatuated and cant help it. He told me to get over it and just relax. That hurt like a mother@#$...Its sad really.
ok, advice time. DO NOT HOOK UP WITH YOUR CRUSH!!!!!!!!!!! EVER!!!!!! keep it platonic if there is no chance of dating, or just date if you are lucky.
Hooking up is the worst thing. You lose respect for yourself and you destroy your fantasy world, because you actually thought that he is interested back and then it ends up that he is not even that interested after he found out. He just used you for a little fun. Now he knows about your feelings, knows that you are "easy" to get and will never ever consider dating you. So just keep fantasizing and dream of the day you meet him privately, because its much for fun to do that than to sit at home and criticize your poor decisions and his complete lack of interest in you. UUUGH
I feel so sick tonite, I found your blog entry and I"m sad to say I'm in a very similar boat (I'm a guy). I liked this married woman for an entire year and had lunch with her regualarly always keeping my distance in regards to romantic notions. But when she divorced I realized I couldn't be her "close friend" as she'd been pressuring me to be, after-all she tried telling me about other men she was screwing. So I basically ended the relations we'd had. I feel like I wasted an entire year with this person, and it's all the more sickening since she did comment quite often on things like "it feels more real when I'm with you"; "I don't know why I'm telling you this I just feel like I can talk to you"; "somethings not right" (our lunch ending) and much more. How she'd go screw random guys if she ever felt like that toward me is a mystery, I realize I'm undatable or was to her anyway. I feel like throwing up :( It's been around 2 weeks since I saw her.
I'm a woman who has a deep crush on a co-worker who is a woman. I really have strong feelings for her, however, she is married to a very possessive man,who is very insecure. As a result, i think that she has reached out to me out of desperation. We have become very close, and I am attracted to her. I'm not sure how she feels about me, but I know she desires to be with me every chance that she get's. I really do not know how to handle this siuation. I think she has deep feelings for me too, but I do not think she will ever confess to this because of her culture and background. What should I do? Should I walk away, or should I ignore my feelings, or should I talk to her about my feelings? This is very hard for me, any suggestions or thoughts?
I guess, I guess I'm in the opposite boat to what you guys are all in. In which, my friend is the one in love with me and I just don't really feel the same way.
We were in the same class all last year and never once spoke, but then this year he became friends with one of my friends and it was the spark that lit the candle that set us all on fire.
We talked everyday from then on. From insanely long conversations on msn to ridiculous amounts of texting each other; we were just always talking. And possibly flirting while we were at it. At that time, I was dating someone, but after a while I broke up with him because he was very verbally abusive and would always blame me for everything, and got jealous so easily.
My friend was always there for me, telling me that I deserved so much better, and wondering why I even tried to remain friends with my ex.
And over the months we continued to talk and flirt, albeit, I didn't really know I was flirting with him - it was just the way i acted around him.
Eventually everyone around us caught onto the fact that he liked me, except for me. It took some of his friends and my friends actually straight out telling me he liked me for me to even see it.
All our friends didn't want us to "separate the group" so they made me tell him I wasn't looking for a relationship. It took me 2 weeks and 17 attempts for me to finally spit it out and tell him that.
We talked it over though, and after a few awkward hours, we were back to normal, talking continuously.
He asked me out later on. Just to make sure there was no hope. I told him all the reasons why. Mainly - I didn't really know what it was like to like someone, and I didn't want to date him and then just dump him because I realise I didn't like him like that and hurt him by giving him hope. We got over it, and moved on.
After months and months, he told me he loved me. He wasn't even close to getting over me. If anything, things had gotten worse. he told me he'd had a crush on me practically since when we'd first met the year before, even though we never talked to another.
The week previously he'd been acting really strange, saying he was "thinking about certain things". He told me he had a friend who was hurting him, though he didn't really know what they were doing to hurt him. He also told me that he'd been spending hours crying and kept feeling pain in his chest. It never once crossed my mind that I was the one hurting him.
After he told me he loved me, and I told him I couldn't return his feelings, we talked about what we wanted to happen. We liked the way things were really, and I guess, in my selfishness and his love for me, we didn't want things to change between us; we still wanted to talk continuously and we didn't want to be awkward.
Things did become awkward for a day or two, and once again, we got over it and moved on... or so I thought.
He really wasn't getting over me. And only yesterday, it hit him that he couldn't have me.
And now, now we don't know what to do, he doesn't really want me to give him space, and I don't want to lose him as a friend.
I know it's selfish, but i love to talk to him and I don't want to lose him, but I want what's best for him, though we can't really figure out what that is right now.
Currently, he's angry at me, for all the time he spent over me when he couldn't have me, but he can't be angry with me, so he's angry at himself and he hates himself. He hates himself enough to almost cut himself over it. And now i'm worried and petrified over what he's thinking of doing to himself.
And we're trying to be normal.
But I'm not sure it'll work this time...
He's one of my best friends. And I hate this part right here so much.
This blog is probably pretty old but I thought that i would share my story. So I'm a junior in high school with no big knowlegde on boys, that was until the summer of my junior year. So this friend hooked me and her best friend up, I had never had my first kiss, let alone had a guy interested in me longer than to answer a question or to help with homework. So after the guy met me and kissed me I thougt we clicked alright. Wasn't fireworks or I didn't notice anyway because I was too nevous about the kiss. Anyway, the guy and I hung out a couple more times and the time before last, I kinda made a stupid move and allowed him to hit second base, but the thing is at the time I didn't have feelings for him like I do/ did. And I believe that I still slightly do have a crush on him. I've told him that I want him and I to do more, maybe even cross the line of being bf and gf, but it's pretty obvious, from body language that he's not interested in me anymore or ever was. But it gets so hard to know where you stand at with a guy when you text him and he never replies back or doesn't reject you when your lookng for the rejection. Anyone have any ideas as to how I should ask him? Or get over him?
Thanks for writting this blog. Really, i am going through this right now. Only before the crush we had four years of friendship so i never said anything but this summer we were on vacation and we up late talking and he said to me, "There isn't anyone that i would even consider starting a relationship with" OUCH. However i am grateful because although it sucks and i was crushing on him for over a year i was spared the terrible convo...i've done that too many times to count. I hate the line that starts "You're a great girl but..."
Thanks for your honesty!
First of, virtual hugs to all. I feel like this entire entry has become a 'confessions of the unrequited' and it's great being able to share and read other people's experiences and know that you're not alone in all your hopelessness, your longing, your wishing that it would all just stop and yet feeling that the feat of getting over them is monumentally impossible.
The thing I hate the most about it all, like so many others have echoed, is when they have given you signs that they feel the same. I haven't liked anyone for a long time. I'm not normally boy-crazy. I see a cute guy, think he's cute, but rule him out entirely because I can't see us realistically getting together. It's a great system, because I don't develop impossible crushes. I haven't liked anyone for over a year since those giddy, giggly years in highschool.
AND THEN.
Enter a proposition from close friends. A set-up. I don't think anything of it, since I figure the moment he sees me, whatever interest he may have had will be reduced to nil. Except. It doesn't. He makes me feel like I'm in some romantic teen comedy where the impossible can happen, the cute guy falls for the plain girl. We have a good time. He's even cuter, nicer, sweeter, funnier than I thought. Not at all the intimidating, assholish lothario I'd made him out to be. He seems to like me. We're laughing, talking. The signs are all there. Except, apparently I've been reading the signs wrong, went and got a little carried away in my head.
And now I'm stuck with a crush on someone who doesn't feel the same, someone who's decided I sounded good enough on paper, by word of mouth, worth a shot, but after the meeting, thought it didn't really work out but was too nice and polite to let me know outright, but let me know by ignoring my texts and failing to follow-up.
Even though we know we should move on, we tend to be gluttons for punishment and stick to some imagined hope that they're just confused right now, and that soon, they will realize that they feel the same way too, the moment being made complete with the sun setting in the background and with him holding your hand and kissing your "but-I-thought-you-didn't-like-me!" tears away.
But we're not in a romantic teen comedy. And it's hard to get over someone when you've envisioned, truly, that he or she was within your reach. It's hard when they say one thing, but mean something else entirely. Hard to be treated special at first, then to be treated as if you didn't exist.
I wish everyone the best of luck. Know that it's not forever, and that getting over them won't happen overnight. I too, would like a lobotomy.
I need help. A little over two years ago I started crushing on my youth minister. He's ten years older and semi-cute. We had the same music tastes and developed a great friendship. I trusted him and asked him questions about God and life and we would facebook eachother all the time and trade cd's. But it started changing into an infatuation...I would never ever show it to him but I started telling him my heart and he would listen. I thought he was just being my teacher/mentor and could never have told him my true feelings. I still know it's wrong, and plus he's with another girl from our church. I know they're getting serious. So I'm trying to get over him...but the only thing that can keep my mind off of him is time away from him...but that means no church or youth group. And I need him...he's one of my best friends. He's been there for me when no one else has. So how do I save the friendship but get rid of the crush that could ruin it? I want to be there for him at his wedding and be honestly happy for whoever he ends up with...but right now I just feel pain thinking about him.
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thanks alot for writing this blog, so many people with unrequited love like me, it inspires me to move forward and keep my head up high, and my eyes towards the sky, and just to let everyone know, we'll all definently find that special person, though the present seems hard, long and unbearable at times as if you'll never get over the person, God would definently take you to that special person, who would love everything about you!
oh wow, it's good to SEE and READ about the fact that i am not the only one going through this crap. I can't believe anything like this would ever happen to me. I've had crushes before but it was never as bad as this one. I've only liked this guy for a couple of weeks and its painful as hell.For me it was love at first sight (like LITERALLY)
The sad thing is all of this would not have happened if my friends had not played this cruel trick on me. It was valentine's day and my high school did this event where you can send roses to ppl anonmyously. So basically, my friends decided to play with me and sent me one saying "I have loved you ever since first semester. Whenever i see your face, i get butterflies in my tummy. Come meet me in the music room today." When i got the note, i asked them if they did it or not, they said no and i believed them. So i got really REALLY curious about who it was. so i would sometimes look across to the music hall.
One morning, i was walking to my first period and in the corner of my eyes, i saw a bunch of ppl coming out of the music hall so i couldnt help myself but to look over and see if i might see anyone that might be suspcious. When i did, the first thing i saw were his eyes. He was also staring back at me. I quicking looked away but that split second costed me much. Something stirred in me when i met his eyes. He was not the most gorgeous guy and i was usually not interested in those guys but i dont know what made me fall for him that moment. I am so confused. Later i realized how painful it became. It was so painful that i couldnt even do my work anymore, or even care about my other values. My freedom was gone. In all my years, i have never felt this bad about a crush. It may be because i know i have no chance with him. He's in another grade and i bet he doesnt even notice me. I think that is what pains me the most. A lot of you can actually talk with your crushes and and are great friends but the fact that i cant even do that is so unbearablly painful. I dont know what to do. It's only been a few weeks but i already cant bear it anymore. I am usually the girl who would never fall so hard. I even promised myself that i won't ever date in highschool so it shouldnt be that painfull. I just dont understand
when my friend finally told me that the note was a joke, i felt even more painful because i have obviously fell for someone i will never be able to have. I hope this feeling will go away soon or else my marks and everything else i value will go down the hill. Now i just hope that God will lead me to recovery.
i recently became frnds wit a guy. due to some problem, he said really bad things about me, which were not true, and i had to face quite a few problems due to that. but i think i hav a crush on him, despite he being so bad to me. cos he keeps popping into my ead. y do i always falll for the wrong guys evrytime?? n nw he's leaving for london for sm wrk. i don't knw wn he'll return as we had officially stopped talking to each other, but i've still got smthng in my head for him. i just wnt to get ovr this guy. hw hw hw..
I wish I could get over this crush in one day! I'd get alot more work done.
I'm 46 and married and my crush is 27 and single. Met him at a blackjack table and he could not have been hotter.
So I'm an idiot that has a crush on an almost one-night stand.
I've caught myself coming up with all kinds of scenarios to see him, but I have to STOP. I hid him from my FB, trying to keep my curiousity at bay. I'm feeling like such a stalker!
Shoot me.
the funny thing of crushes is that they make liars of us all. When a man shows you who he is.. believe him.. .they are not complex creatures. tend to talk and act straight when it comes to life and love and you need to walk away and let him go and if he Lets you go then he wasnt the man that will hold and protect your heart... and with every step the pain will abate and life will go on and you will begin to see all the other men that have been looking at you with broken hearts waiting for you to open your eyes
ahh love defff sucks. i asked this guy named chris to marry me, and he said no. like a bullet in he heart.
ahh love defff sucks. i asked this guy named chris to marry me, and he said no. like a bullet in he heart.
You know what sucks?
I'm falling in love with someone. It's like most peoples' stories in here, but I'm falling for a girl. I'm a girl as well. How am I supposed to tell her that I love her?
I have a crush on my colleague. the rest of my colleagues seem to adore him but they don't like the fact that he's a smoker. All my friends are non smokers. he isn't even my cup of tea! must have been his big eyes that attract me. I've almost let slip that I like him but now I'm starting to see his negative character traits & aware that it's physical attraction. regardless, as he's my colleague, I wish him happiness & good health. all I want is his friendship.
I have had a crush on the same guy for going on 3 years. He sees me as an annoying, whiny moron. He makes me hate myself and him, at the same time I would give up my life for him. It's driving me crazy.
I love the hottest guy EVER, and he doesn't notice me. Well, he does, but he thinks I'm annoying. I hate it!!!! I wish he'd just realize that he's wrecking someone's life. He's made me suicidal and given me false hope and I still can't figure him out, does he like me or not? I don't think so, but I still have a thread of hope. He's right near me right now, and he could look at what I'm typing if he tried. OH MY GOD, IT'S SO FRUSTERATING!!!
I know what you all mean. I've been in love with this man for 3 years unfortunatly he was my school maths teacher and although i left school last year i'm still a mentor there and every time i see him i like him even more. Everytime he tells me I look beautiful and diserve to be swept off my feel it makes me feel like there may be a chance, i know its stupid and total imoral but i can't stop thinking about him.
That's gotta suck. I wish unrequited love didn't exist. -_-' It's frusterating to the point of insanity.
There he is again...right near me...and I can't get him out of my head. Heavan help me, I'm an idiot, but it's like his image is burned into the back of my eyeballs and I see him whenever my eyes are closed. And pain...it's all I feel these days.
Crushes can be tough, for sure...and it seems I've been in one crush after another since 3rd grade. Supposedly I crush excessively because I grew up without a father in the house but I think that's a lot of psychobabble...and yeah, you guessed it, I'm in crush mode now and this guy is soooo out of my league it's not even funny. I see him everyday on the job (he's in management, i'm not) AND also at my house of worship, so I have to keep a lid on it, for sure. I love my job and my church and don't want to leave either, so I know this 'crush' thing has to be dealt with tout suite. Not easy, but I know what must be done. At nearly age 50, I'm no spring chicken and I figure I can't afford to go out of my head in this situation. I don't think he knows, or if he does, he's being a gentleman about it to spare both of us embarrassment. Still as uncomfortable and 'inconvenient' and straight up distracting as this crush is, it is comforting to read other people's stories here...and know I'm not the only one out there dealing with crush-itis :)
I recently had a crush on someone.There was a group of female sonography students close to where some of my classes were.I just sat down with a friend on time during lunch and there was one of them.A petite latina woman with her friend.Older than I was (About 25 when I was 19),but still,really feminine and attractive in her own way. Anyways,she kept making eye contact with me,which I interpreted as a sign that I was liked.I loved it!A girl seemed like she liked me!Being a introvert who thought that I had to act like an asshole on the WWW to break some ground,I made an account on Adultfriendfinder to say some things so people would at least see that my personality was not dry yet.The idea was to get people to "flow" to me.A stupid fucking idea at the kindest!However,she read it and I knew immediately that it was doing something.Eventually,I sat close to this girl and read a paper.She tried to say something,but cut herself off.I really started to notice her smile later on at me.One of those really feminine rosy-cheecked smiles where the corner of her eyes would wrinkle up.Eventually,noticing that I was losing her interest,I put a comment into "Grapevines",a little rant/comment column in our school's newspaper.Basically ,I told her how much affection I had for her and asked her if she wanted to go for a soda or what have you(In retrospect,I should not have referenced her appearance).I got a bit of "hate mail",but I believed that was from a troll and dismissed it.She came around all dressed up one day and I could not do anything,but,she mumbled to her friend "He's not all that" in my dialect,mocking it.I thought there was nothing to this.People say shit all the time,so I kept on persevering.I saw her at the end of the week getting tutored.She was dressed up again.I read a paper and did not say anything out of respect for her and her work.She went to go get something and I ask the tutor some questions to take the edge off of being there.She came around and then the two of them prepared to go to a teacher,when I told them to have a nice day.She seemed to be very flattered.The muscles in her face were in overdrive,trying not to show her emotions.Fast forward a couple of months.I found out that she was taking a practicum at a clinic.Since she was either working or in a large group of girls (which someone who has never being exposed to girls in that sort of scenario dreads.), it was very difficult to talk with her.I spotted her around my neighbourhood.I made these trips around just to find out when to talk with her.Finally.I spotted her one day.She spotted me and hopped on a bus to avoid me.I hung around the neighbourhood a little while.About thirty minutes later,I see her again.She is walking with someone,A woman.Middle aged,darker skinned,to a car.I hear them talking,then I hear "I don't even like him." I felt an icy chill in the core of my torso.It hurt so badly.Why would you flirt with me if you weren't interested?What did you see in me?I would not have hurt you physically,there was no need to bring someone to watch out for you.You could have just said openly that you were not interested in me and I would have fuckered off!I don't know anymore if people are flirting because they genuinely find me attractive or because it helps their ego.
I recently had a crush on someone.There was a group of female sonography students close to where some of my classes were.I just sat down with a friend on time during lunch and there was one of them.A petite latina woman with her friend.Older than I was (About 24-25 when I was 19),but still,really feminine and attractive in her own way.She kept smiling at me-rosy-cheecked eye wrinkling smiles.I found out one day that she had a practicum coming up.I would do whatever I had to to talk with her.Fast forward a couple of months.I find out that her practicum clinic is around my neighbourhood.I try and do whatever I need to get her to talk to me.For someone who has never really being exposed to girls in a huge crowd,combined with the fact that she was always busy when I saw her,talking at school was very difficult.So,anyways, I go to the area and spot her.She spots me,hops on a bus to avoid me.I stick around the neighbourhood.I see her after a half hour accompany a older darker-skinned woman to a car.They are talking.Along the way I hear "I don't even like him."My spirit just dropped!Well why did you flirt with me?Why didn't you tell me?You did not have to involve someone else!I would not have hurt you!I wonder now who is truly interested and who is in it for their ego or other reasons.I hate teaseful people.
I still love him, no matter what they say on websites and such (blah blah blah, you're only hurting yourself, get yourself back together, they'll never love you back). Friends say we'd be so cute together, our parents know each other, everything's perfect exept...he doesn't like me back. It stings. It really stings.
I`m in the same situation...I`m 16 and just finished my fiers year in high school...I met a guy in the class nextdoor, he`s the same age.
He`s smart, polite, cute(as in good looking but more of a child`s face), he`s in the sports club, friendly and so on...I imediatelly fell for him so I decided to get as close to him as posible and so I did. We got to the point where we were best friends. Ow and he always, ALWAYS looked at me at school when I was with somebody else(once I noticed that he looked at me every 10 seconds, literary, my friends told me and I checked myself and noticed). He always emailed me first and used to call me. We talked on the phone for hours. He told me that the thing that makes him happiest is my happiness and stuff like that...He always hit on me, and I found out that he never had a girlfriend untill then from his friend(my friend as well) and that he is the shy type when it comes to relationships so I gave him time to know me(6 months, more exactly) and then I gathered all of my courage and confessed my fellings online(he asked me what place would I like to have in his life). When I told him he told me that it`s too soon and that we should wait a while longer and that he didn`t want to ruin our friendship and that he`s not sure of what he feels...I said okey and waited...At about a week he asked me out on a date, just the two of us, and we had so much fun X3 We went to the cinema and then for a walk and chatted and so on. The next day I asked him about his feelings and he told me that he wants us to remain friends for the time being and that he did`nt say that in the future he might not want more(I`m really sorry for my english >.<). I was brokenhearted...I was afraid that he might not talk to me after the incident but on the contrary, we remained friends...But after two weeks he started being cold towards me and tell his friend that he didn`t care about what I`m doing :| I called him and asked him what`s wrong and he told me that nothing was wrong, I asked him if I did something to upset him and he replied that I didn`t upset him...And recently it seems like we`re okey but...He`ll never response to my fellings and recently it seemed like I stopped liking him but when I think about him now, my tears start flowing...I hope you`ll get over him as soon as posible...I hope I will as well...Best wishes X0X0
WOW! So great to see I'm not the only one. I've had a crush on a guy for AN ENTIRE YEAR and then last weekend we finally had some time alone together. We had drinks and he was being very charming and asked me about what I liked in terms of favourite romantic songs, was I a romantic, even what kind of sex I liked. So like a dork I got a bit tipsy and invited him to my hotel room. He got more playful there but we just talked and then we hugged when he left. The next day he sent me a flirty text and I texted back. Then he texted me to see if I wanted to get together that night for drinks. I texted him and said I needed an early night but that I would like to go for a walk. He didn't text back. Then the next day I sent him a good bye text as I was leaving town and he didn't text back. So now I feel like a COMPLETE IDIOT because obviously he just wanted sex, and there I was acting like a total lovestruck fool. And now I can see all the clues that he doesn't actually like me (just wanted sex): he bought me another drink when I thought we were leaving; he was "romantic" even though we've never been that way together before; he wouldn't leave the hotel until I said I wanted to get some sleep; after it was clear nothing would happen I invited him to stay over but he made up an excuse to leave. And I also confided a bunch of work related stuff to him, which I should never have told ANYONE. Thank GOD I didn't have sex with him. BUT THE WORST PART IS - i STILL LIKE HIM EVEN THOUGH HE ONLY WANTS AN "F" BUDDY.
I was searching all over the internet for ways to get back with my ex girlfriend and I finally found what I'm looking for, I went to www.saveabreakup.com and it helped me a lot get back with my ex love, and now we are back together.
I remember meeting this guy on the first day of work, and thinking "wow". At the time I had a boyfriend but I broke up with him because of this guy. We talked a lot at first, and he even asked me out to lunch and dinner But being the fool that I was, I said no for some crazy reason. After a while he stopped talking to me, and became really cold. I gave up and later found a new boyfriend, but a few months ago I started talking to the guy again. It was like I fell for him all over again. I broke up with my boyfriend in the hopes that we could finally get together. We were so close for awhile, and even went out a few times. But nothing happened. Just like when I first met him, hes gotten cold again. And I'm right back where I started: single, alone, missing him and wondering why I was such a fool.
Oh My gawd people. Thats why they are called CRUSHES! bEcause they CRUSH YOU! If you are lucky crushes turn into something meaningful but the point of them is tof ind out what you do and dont like in a person,not to spend your entire time wallowing over it. Grow a pair and move on!
I had a crush on a guy for about two years. He was engaged. Then, a miracle happenned. They broke up. I was considered a friend at a time, and he was really upset. He would come over most nights and we'd talk, and one evening, I gave into impulse and kissed him. But it was much more than a kiss-we slept together. I didn't see him for a week after that, but then one day he showed up at my door with roses and told me he loved me. We were together for 3 years before we split up, but he was the best kisser I've ever dated.
Do not let this person's lack of affection toward you define who you are: only you should do this!
Everyday say to yourself that you are an attractive,sexy, caring and sensitive person that someone, somewhere will be lucky enough to be with.
Remember: be kind to yourself, you haven't done anything wrong. So, find a way to love yourself again,joint a buddhist group ... smile, look on the bright side of life ... life is so wonderful ... and finding yourself attractive is the first step towards other people finding you attrative.
Good luck!
I understand. I've had a crush on the same guy for about 12 years.
We met through friend in my late teens I'm 30 now.
The friend I met him through used to have parties in his living room with another friends band playing.
We would sit on my friends sofa and chat, usually about the other bloke I liked that went to the same school as him and other stuff. We got on, but hes the kind of bloke whos friends with everyone. Hes so funny, intelligent, talented (can play many instruments), and kind.
I remember the last time I saw him, he brought the girl friend he had at the time to one of the parties. It was horrible for me but it I got through the evening. Fast forward 11 years and we get back in touch via facebook. Hes now living the party life in Germany, has many friends, in band, and just having the best time.
My friend saw him last time he came over to the UK Christmas is approaching so i know the chances of seeing him is possible. If did would be first time in 13 years!
Its hard, I just hope my crush never comes out. The consequences are just unthinkable.
I've also had a crush on a girl for six years now. It's been quite hard for me. It kind of makes me feel like I'm not growing up. Like I can't do more with myself. I want to move on. I always ask myself if it could be love but how could it be; when we only know each other from afar. I always try to tell her but it always makes me look like a real jerk. Sometimes, I even delete here number and email address just to keep myself from contacting her. But I always go back. Not a day goes buy that I don't think about her. Its become like a drug. I have had other affairs but nothing worked. I broke up with three girls in a year just because they couldn't meet the standard of which she was the benchmark. I have to admit that aside that I have tried to let her know, I have never really mustered the balls to tell her exactly how I feel and to ask her if she feels the same way. Does anyone have a tip? It will go a long way to be of much help for me.
I was insanely in love with the same guy for a year and a month. I'm just beginning to get over him. But even now I still feel like I've been stabbed in the heart with an icicle very time see him or even hear someone speak his name. I thought he was everything I had ever wanted in a guy.
But he wasn't.
And now, no matter how I try, I can't stop myself from loving him. I hate him for breaking my heart so many times; the worst part is he never knew that what he was doing hurt me so badly inside. So for that, I hate him. But at the same time I love him. And that makes me hate myself for being weak enough to keep loving someone that does only negative things to me. So I'm angry at myself for having these feelings and falling for him in the first place, and angry at him for being so blind and hurtful without even trying. I'm mainly just enraged at myself for creating this image of perfection that I associate with him, without looking at some of the finer details.
But now I've decided that I'm tired of it. I'm tired of this impossible relationship that I keep dreaming of at night. I'm tired of crying myself to sleep. I'm tried of smiling at him, even though my heart it slowly breaking. And most of all, I'm tired, exhausted, fed up with constantly remembering the day he said, "I don't think I could ever think of you as more than as a friend."
So that's it. I'm never going back to him. And if there's someday in the far future where he might discover that he may have been wrong about what he said to me on that day, well tough luck sweetie.
MAKE. ME.
Love is never one-sided, wait for the right person to come in to your life. Love life and enjoy it’s each and every moment, as life is beautiful. unrequited love
I'll be 40 later this year,...and thought that I would have been WELL past the age of ever experiencing something like a crush again. Not so. As someone else has said, no one is exempt.
I feel very much like an idiot/dork. This type of crush that I am experiencing is like the same ones that I had in the 3rd grade. And as logical as my mind works (I am an engineer by trade), there is no logic where these emotions are concerned.
The girl is 13 years younger than me, and is a co-worker. Not the most beautiful girl I've ever seen -- in fact, she's only maybe a 6.5 out of 10. But she is intelligent, and certainly cute, and I simply can't stop thinking about her. Oh, yeah,...and another thing...I'm married, with 3 kids. WTF am I thinking/doing?
We haven't spent much time together, but we see each other a lot, passing in the halls. We smile and say "hi", and only once in a great while have a very brief conversation. I keep wanting to ask her to dinner, but know that I can't hide the fact that I am married, at least for very long.
Maybe I'm not so far gone to need a lobotomy,...but I'll be happy to take a few swift swings to the cranium with a baseball bat. Maybe the pain will supersede the aching and emotional agony that my heart feels right now.
Right. I just stumbled across this blog and must say I'm amazed at how much in common I have with some of these situations. Main point: People are confusing. Nothing's all that simple. A gesture can mean different things to different people. I'm still getting over my crush but it's not that easy when you keep running into him/her. I've realized something though: THINKING ABOUT IT WILL ONLY WASTE YOUR TIME AND LIFE. SO STOP AND MOVE ON. JUST CARRY ON WITH YOUR WORK AND THINK ABOUT IT DURING YOU BREAK OR AT NIGHT. BUT PLEASE DON'T STOP YOUR WORK. Biggest mistake I did. I became dysfunctional. I simply could not focus. I come from a very small family. I'm an only child. We move a lot from country to country and as a result, I 've never had a close friend. I've never had a boyfriend either. So when I started college and this guy I kinda liked started giving me attention, I was pleasently surprised. Because no one had ever shown that much interest in me; I felt thrilled. I know, pretty stupid, but I couldn't help it, plus, I liked him. A lot. We shared a lot in common and he was always so clever and I just love talking to him. I could go on and on about him but I think that'd be unhealthy. So PEOPLE PLEASE LISTEN, IF IT IS UNREQUITED, DON'T FEEL THROWN, IT HAPPENS, YOU JUST GOTTA MOVE ON, TRY DOING SOMETHING YOU ENJOY, PARTICIPATE IN EXTRA CURRICULAR ACTIVITIES, GO OUT, HAVE FUN, BE YOU AND DON'T EVER CHANGE YOURSELF TO SUIT SOMEONE YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON!
Many of the people who post here have been with a crush for much more time than me, but I still believe there are many common elements. I'm 16 years old and finishing Year 1 of the DP in my school (IB of course). This is my story.Last August, a girl which belonged to my same grade but not class (I was in B and she was in A) started to attend many of my classes. I knew her since we were 5 years old but never had too much contact. Until that moment. At first we didn't talk a lot and I was like ignoring her, but, as time went by, I felt kind of strange when I was around her, a very weird sensation was invading me, but I did not put much attention to it. The day of my birthday party, a couple of months later, when she showed up, I remember thinking how cute she looked with those clothes, something I had never, never REALLY thought about any girl.Something was not right. After that I played soccer with my other friends, chatted for a while and then, after dinner, danced with her. I experienced an unprecedented feeling within myself. My hands were sweating, my heart was beating at mach speed, and when I looked into her eyes it felt like time itself had stopped. I couldn't believe it. Later, when the party was over, she say good bye, hugged me, and five minutes later I was in the bathroom, crying uncontrollably. I realized that, for the first time in my life, I was in love with a girl, and, worst of all, a girl completely out of my league. She is very smart, emotionally stable and a very good bass player, not to mention beautiful, while I'm an ugly, pessimistic, weak and good-for-nothing freak (aside from writing school stuff such as essays and short stories). There is not a single chance of me having any kind of relationship with her for three main reasons: First of all we are part of the same hang-out group and so it would be seen as weird and wrong by the others, second, she has a rule of no relationships with guys from school, and third, as I said before, she is too wonderful for a sad douche like me. Four months have passed since the day of my acknowledgement of the crush and there have been countless moments of grief and sadness over my unreturned, impossible love. I have tried many times to get over her but I still have not figured the way out. I'm just glad to know I'm not alone and many other people feel the same way. We must support each other and find a way out of it together. I do not believe any of us deserves this pain.
hey,i had a big cursh on this guy he was so cute and things for about 2 or 1 year i never had the chance or wanted to talk to him but he manage to broke my heart two times
but i add him in my facebook friends and by mistake actually tell him that i loved him in a facebook post i was so shy by then i go to school and he was there watching my every moves just like my friends a far relation started i look at him and he look at me sometimes smile i was so happy and i was starting to think that he was triying to get my attention so i dress up more cut and maybe a little sexy he was still loking at me but one day a friend told me he was going to move away it broke my heart the last day in my town he decide to stay i was pissed off and probably should of stop my crushed there but i continu till the day that i learn from my friend that he was in a relationship cause she saw him frenching a girl one year older than him
my heart for the second time broke that day
and now since there is a lot of poeple that knew that i loved him dont stop looking at me a weird way thinking that i crying inside and out
Ijust want to get rid of that big crush cause it hurt so much and im shure time and maturity wont do much for my heart is broken.
I dont know what to do, it has been barely a week and I can no longer oogle him, my only source of watching him is youtube, twitter. He didnot even accept my friend request in facebook. He is probably 10 years older tham me, I feel so insinificant. He is a princeton graduate & did masters from Harvard. Possibly his standards are high. But I did provoke him & was somewhat offended by his reaction, ut gracious God im going bonkers. I respect this person, I admire him & mostly Ilove him. I have never loved anyone, that is an inferior dimension or paradigm for me. But now I see myself falling, fallin so bad. But atleast I was fortunate enough to spent precious time with him, appeal to his hiher reasoning. And he always has & always inspires me.He wil be my eternal love. MY one & only. And its not even that tragic, I think I am strong enough to hold on to it.
Im glad its not just me the fact im on the net searching how to get over a crush says it all.He is extremly handsome 10 years or so younger than me and im 45.I dont know which way to look.Yesterday i told myself i would confront him and tell him my feelings so as to get over this.And of course i ran into him this morning like i often do just as i was about to get out of my car and pour my heart out he drove off.Damnit this is ridiculous
I am going through it right trying to move on bad thing I see her twice a week being we are in the same church, it does hurt badly she goes out of her way to avoid me and I finally realized I just don't go in her direction cause her purposely avoiding me was quite painful especially when Iv'e done nothing but like her and always was nice to her
I'm kinda in the same boat but different.
I have a crus on the new kid at school and just found out that my friend a.k.a sister has a crush on him 2. We worked out our situtation but. She and I both know that he likes her two. I don't want to go through this situtation again as I did during my sixth grade year. I'd rather get over him than ruin my relationship with my friend. Any good suggestions?
I can't stop thinking about this guy, it's sort of complicated. I like him a lot, and he reeeeally liked me, and he told my best friend! And of course u can imagine she told me... But now he doesn't like me anymore and I'm still hopelessly in love with him. The worst of it is that I KNOW THAT HE ISN'T THE HOTTEST, I KNOW THAT HE IS A PLAYER, AND I KNOW THAT HE PREFERS BLONDES, but I don't care I love him anyway :'( it sux!!! Plus everytime I hear a song I picture him singing it to me, I've fantasizes about marrying this guy and I'm in flipping JUNIOR HIGH SCHOOL!!! I shouldn't have these emotions yet!!! Every blank moment in my mind I think about sucking face with him... And if that's not pathetic, I have no idea what is!!!
I can't stop thinking about this guy, it's sort of complicated. I like him a lot, and he reeeeally liked me, and he told my best friend! And of course u can imagine she told me... But now he doesn't like me anymore and I'm still hopelessly in love with him. The worst of it is that I KNOW THAT HE ISN'T THE HOTTEST, I KNOW THAT HE IS A PLAYER, AND I KNOW THAT HE PREFERS BLONDES, but I don't care I love him anyway :'( it sux!!! Plus everytime I hear a song I picture him singing it to me, I've fantasizes about marrying this guy and I'm in flipping JUNIOR HIGH SCHOOL!!! I shouldn't have these emotions yet!!! Every blank moment in my mind I think about sucking face with him... And if that's not pathetic, I have no idea what is!!!
i totally get how u feel.... i met this girl in my freshman year of college and soon we became good friends and went to the same church and developed the same group of friends. sometime near the beginning of second year i realized i had feelings for her but at the same time i noticed she didn't like me but liked my best buddy/roommate instead. so all year long i held back from telling her how i felt. at the end of second year i finally decided i should tell her so i texted her up saying i wanted to talk and told her how i felt about her. nedless to say she rejected me but what made things worse was she started dating my roomate that same night! now that they are together and since both of them are my good friends i tend to see them alot and everytime i see them together, holding hands i feel like crying deep inside. although as of now i have moved on mentally there are some emotions that still linger so i guess the only true solution to this kind of problems really is just TIME.
Im in high school and im in love with a guy who has a girlfriend and i dont even know who she is and ive told him that i like him but he just says he wants to be friends but then goes off and gets a girlfriend and he doesnt even get to see her everyday it sucks so much and im just looking for a way to either get him to want me or to get him out of my head...
Im in high school and im in love with a guy who has a girlfriend and i dont even know who she is and ive told him that i like him but he just says he wants to be friends but then goes off and gets a girlfriend and he doesnt even get to see her everyday it sucks so much and im just looking for a way to either get him to want me or to get him out of my head...
Hmmmm.where do I start? For over a year I have had a crush on a guy I work with. I know how it happened...he is my idea of perfection. He is a senior computer programmer, comes from a well-respected family, he is strkingly handsome and. Has a sense of humor. when we met, sparks flew. However he is policy driven and I feel he is afraid to cross tje line so we can go out. I am tired of waiting amd I have tried movong on and ig.oring him but he surfaces unannounced at my office door, flashes a pearly smile and it isnother setback. I just want to move on. t is not healthy chasing someone who want devote time and attention to you.
I've had a crush on this guy for two and a half years now. Well, I say it's a crush to assured myself that it will pass, but like every teenager I'm internally convinced its love. I feel trapped, like I really may never get over him.
Thing is I was three when I first met him; same preschool. And I never realised at the time but he was my first crush. Few years later we completely forgot about each othe until we met again at a Chem class when we both were 12. It took me six months to fall in love with him all over again. A year and a half ago, he found out that I had a crush on him, and I kind of lost it when he did, and like the moron that I am I overreacted and said things due to which we aren't even on talking terms right now. We've deleted each other from our friend lists on social networking sites and have little or no contact anymore.
The problem? Though there's a part of me that he pissed off, a greater part still loves him. It just takes one glance on my part to send my heart reeling again. I don't even think he knows I exist anymore.
I don't know what to do. I feel trapped often, like I might never get over him. I keep thinking that we were meant to be because of all the great chemistry we've had in the past. But that's all in broken pieces now. I've had a crush before and I obviously got over him, but I've got a gut feeling that it won't happen this time.
HELP????
I've had a crush on this guy for two and a half years now. Well, I say it's a crush to assured myself that it will pass, but like every teenager I'm internally convinced its love. I feel trapped, like I really may never get over him.
Thing is I was three when I first met him; same preschool. And I never realised at the time but he was my first crush. Few years later we completely forgot about each othe until we met again at a Chem class when we both were 12. It took me six months to fall in love with him all over again. A year and a half ago, he found out that I had a crush on him, and I kind of lost it when he did, and like the moron that I am I overreacted and said things due to which we aren't even on talking terms right now. We've deleted each other from our friend lists on social networking sites and have little or no contact anymore.
The problem? Though there's a part of me that he pissed off, a greater part still loves him. It just takes one glance on my part to send my heart reeling again. I don't even think he knows I exist anymore.
I don't know what to do. I feel trapped often, like I might never get over him. I keep thinking that we were meant to be because of all the great chemistry we've had in the past. But that's all in broken pieces now. I've had a crush before and I obviously got over him, but I've got a gut feeling that it won't happen this time.
HELP????
I met him first when I was three. Yes, three. I didn't realise at the moment, but he became my first crush. A year later, we both forgot about each other.
Then when I was 12, we met again. We had a lot of same classes, and he always sat behind me. He invented a nicknames for me, and we both talked all day long so much so that people began wondering if something was up.
Next year suddenly our contact was cut off to the minimal, and I realised I actually was in love with him. He found out about that, and spread it to a lot of his friends. That angered me and I perhaps overreacted, and took out all my anger at him. After that world war, we deleted each other from our socail networking sites and from our respective worlds. We don't see eye to eye, and now have barely any communication. Last time I talked to him was eight months ago, that too a word or two about his crush. Yeah.
The problem? I still have a crush on him. Its been two and a half years and it looks almost incurable to me. I've had a crush before and I obviously got over him but I just don't think it's going to work this time. To the outside world we don't like each other anymore even as friends, which is probably true on his end, but to me I feel like I'm going ot burst one day.
I keep saying its a crush to assure myself that I might get through this one day, but like every teenager (I'm 15 now!) I'm really convinced on the inside its love.
SOS!
I met him first when I was three. Yes, three. I didn't realise at the moment, but he became my first crush. A year later, we both forgot about each other.
Then when I was 12, we met again. We had a lot of same classes, and he always sat behind me. He invented a nicknames for me, and we both talked all day long so much so that people began wondering if something was up.
Next year suddenly our contact was cut off to the minimal, and I realised I actually was in love with him. He found out about that, and spread it to a lot of his friends. That angered me and I perhaps overreacted, and took out all my anger at him. After that world war, we deleted each other from our socail networking sites and from our respective worlds. We don't see eye to eye, and now have barely any communication. Last time I talked to him was eight months ago, that too a word or two about his crush. Yeah.
The problem? I still have a crush on him. Its been two and a half years and it looks almost incurable to me. I've had a crush before and I obviously got over him but I just don't think it's going to work this time. To the outside world we don't like each other anymore even as friends, which is probably true on his end, but to me I feel like I'm going ot burst one day.
I keep saying its a crush to assure myself that I might get through this one day, but like every teenager (I'm 15 now!) I'm really convinced on the inside its love.
SOS!
I met him first when I was three. Yes, three. I didn't realise at the moment, but he became my first crush. A year later, we both forgot about each other.
Then when I was 12, we met again. We had a lot of same classes, and he always sat behind me. He invented a nicknames for me, and we both talked all day long so much so that people began wondering if something was up.
Next year suddenly our contact was cut off to the minimal, and I realised I actually was in love with him. He found out about that, and spread it to a lot of his friends. That angered me and I perhaps overreacted, and took out all my anger at him. After that world war, we deleted each other from our socail networking sites and from our respective worlds. We don't see eye to eye, and now have barely any communication. Last time I talked to him was eight months ago, that too a word or two about his crush. Yeah.
The problem? I still have a crush on him. Its been two and a half years and it looks almost incurable to me. I've had a crush before and I obviously got over him but I just don't think it's going to work this time. To the outside world we don't like each other anymore even as friends, which is probably true on his end, but to me I feel like I'm going ot burst one day.
I keep saying its a crush to assure myself that I might get through this one day, but like every teenager (I'm 15 now!) I'm really convinced on the inside its love.
SOS!
I have seen a couple of my mates go through rough turn downs. But they managed to get over their crushes after a while. I asked them how. They said time is the answer. I didn't believe them. But I did notice that one of them was now going out with someone and the other was crushing on someone else. So I figured the key to getting over a crush is to avoid a lot of contact with them and crush on someone else. I know it isn't the easiest thing in the world because I am trying to use this to get over a crush I have had for almost a year. The idea of crushing on someone else when you are already crushing one a person is a bit far fetched. But it works. So I guess it's worth the effort.
I have had crushes on many, many, guys, and men, over a span of 40 years. On the one hand, I look at it as healthy and a wonderful gift that I can be attracted to so many different men. On the other hand, while I've had my share of boyfriends, and a marriage (I'm divorced at present but have a boyfriend), none of these crushes have had reciprocal feelings for me and that hurts. Ouch. It's definitely a sledge hammer to self-esteem/confidence, and I spend way too much time spinning it all in my mind, trying to "figure" things out. When I read "He's just not that into you" I learned guys/men are simple. When they like you, they let you know. Don't waste your "pretty" in life -- that said, I'm still struggling, thankful that I find so many men attractive, fearful that it works its way into my mind and messes with me (or rather I give it that power). I'm trying to find a little humor right now -- I'm attracted to a blue collar type, so I've made a list of his negative qualities as best I can, and I try to think of him as "Uncle Jessie" from Dukes of Hazard and that cracks me up. No, I don't want to wind up running away with Uncle Jessie thank you very much. And who do I call the gal my crush likes? "Boss Hogg" of course. OK so some humor and laughs can go a long way to making me smile, relax and try to move on. Love to you all!!! It's all part of life.
even me. but its all bad since its been difficult already but i cant stop loving her. i even have started to stalk her in fb things are worser that she just dont wanna listen to me. i love her and hate her too i just wanna take her down i mean to do the kill or kill myself plz help me???
wow the guy i had a crush on wasn't just an assehole he was filth, a jerk, a bully,and made sure i lost my job. Sad to say the attraction lingers still, but if i ever see him again i'll probably have the same fury. He had no right to treat anyone as badly as he treated me. Not only did he act disgusted by me, he outright refused to sit anywhere near me. He was a real piece of work.
Wow, thanks for your post, all these comments make me feel both hopeful and despaired. On one hand it seems that eventually there will be a wake-up call that helps you get over your crush, on the other hand people are reporting 10/15/20 year long crushes :|. I told my friends about my crush about a year into it but they'd think I was lame if I told them I still have it 7 years later...
I've known of my crush since I was about 12 and we became friends about a year later. We all hung around in a big friendship group so we didn't really get to know each other very well, but eventually we started working on projects together and became good friends. In 2004 it came to light that 2 girls liked him and it felt like I was holding my breath until he politely told them he wasn't interested. That's when I realised I had feelings for him. I also realised that I could never tell him as he'd become one of my best friends and I couldn't bare to lose him or be rejected by someone whose opinion I value so greatly.
Let me tell you about him 7 years ago, he was a short, skinny, really intelligent, very funny, genuinely nice guy and quite cute of course. To top this all of though, he was incredibly shy and awkward he actually said he was going never going to do the typical "love-marriage- baby" route and would instead "become a hermit and live alone". Me 7 years ago: tall for a girl- 5'10" and heavy with it and also very shy, we just didn't seem compatible.
When we were at school together I did all the things that other posters have done- analysed every conversation, hand signal and smile to try and determine whether he felt the same way about me but ended up going round in circles. We used to have little 'things' that were just between us, we'd have a competition to see whose hands were colder, and our friends would just laugh and ask, "Are you guys holding hands again?" And he'd initiate it-See?!
Then in '06 when we were done with school he said he was going away on a gap year to a faraway land and I felt that this might be my chance to get over him. Out of sight, out of mind right? Nope, it was a case of absence makes the heart grow fonder. I practically counted the days and carefully de-constructed the messages he sent me. He came back and it was like love at first sight, this transformation didn't probably happen as suddenly as it felt, but I hadn't seen him in about 8 months, he was taller than me and had filled out and I'd lost my baby fat and now it didn't seem so strange for us to be together and for the next few months we did what felt to me like flirting...
Then we had university to go to, I went north and he went really north. We stopped contacting each other quite so much but still met up each time we were both back home for Summer or Christmas, each time was like a punch, even if it was just for a few hours I'd reset back to being hopelessly in love with him. I've had relationships with other guys but it's like no one can compare to him and I'd rather be alone than lead someone else on. The fact he's never had a serious relationship also keeps me wondering.
I completed my degree and have been home for a year now and he's finishing and coming back next month, which is why I ended up here after what could possibly be the most awkward search I've ever run. It's likely that I'll be seeing a lot more of him and I don't want to be stuck in this situation forever so on one hand I'm hoping that it'll be the case of the 7 year itch and I'll be miraculously over him on the other I'm so used to feeling this way about him it'd make me empty and I wouldn't have an excuse not to give other relationships a shot.
Long post but it feels good to vent and get my confession out. Best of luck with your crushes people -Jx
Well what a relief, I am not alone! Great to read all these posts especially those from people my age (40's).
I am married and reasonably happy, but just cannot stop having crushes on colleagues that usually end with me switching jobs! My job requires me to be confident, which I usually am, but in the presence of my crush I'm so awkward.
This is just not pleasant. He is friendly but today I popped down to see him and his team, and half way through he walked off to make a cup of coffee knowing I was only around for a couple of minutes. Just a sign there is no interest, no deliberate snub but it hurt so much I felt sick and someone asked if I was alright!! I have no idea how to get over this. Although some good tips in posts above!
It can be very hard to get over somebody. I'm pratically in the same boat as everybody. The first time that I met this guy was when I was 5 years old and he was 8 years old. We pratically grew along side each other as cousins or just relatives. Though we are not related by anyway.For certain family gatherings he was there and we would play with each other all the time.I have always had a crush on him since the first time we played tag. Though we grew up and suddenly before you know it years had passed us by. Although I began developing feelings for other guys he had other girlfriends of such. But when I turned 15 and I began to converse with him and I connected with him. I began to like him and fall for him hard. I told him I liked him and he didn't reject me but he didn't accept either. He had a girlfriend at the time. He said that it made him happy to hear I like him and that's it.
I was confused that he hadn't rejected me outright but happy that he said he was glad. When we met again at a family gathering it was a bit awkward but it didn't stop him from flirting with me.I was surprised why he would act this way towards me considering his girlfriend was there at the time. But I finally decided to take his comment as a rejection and tried my best to get over him. I am now 18 years old and he is now 20 years old. I can honestly say that I think I fell in love with him hard. I cannot keep away the contact between me and him at all. I always contact him first. It has been more than 3 years and I'm still crazy for him as I was when I first met him ages ago. I cry myself to sleep when I hear that he's had one night stands or a new girlfriend.I'm at a loss of what to do....I haven't seened him in months so 'out of sight and out of mind' doesn't work at least not for my case.
Please help me.
My gosh i started my blog because my crush was such an arsehole. I lost my job because he turned my team against me, and the boss whose toes he'd suck if they were on fire, was giving me all this attention he craved. It's hard to get over crushes, but seriously, i've been there. It sucks making the effort and someone can't even give you the time of day. Un requited love is definitely not gratuitous, unless you channel that energy for love you have for your self, work, or someone else.
http://redebonyhotspot.blogspot.com
i know how all of u feel ive had this massive crush on this one guy since like the beguining of my freshman year and i kind of kept my feelings hidden cuz my other frinds liked him too so towards the end of the year i got an urge to tell him how i felt so i did kind of through a text and know he wont even answer my txts and i tried to add him via facebook but he kep denying me i really really like him but i knoe its never gona workout so how do i get over him cuz hes practically perfect: hes fuckin cute, he has a great sense of humor, he has a sexy ass smile hes smart and hes a football/baseball player pliz help me get over him does anyone have any tips on how????
A year and a half ago i met one of my neighbors and i thought he was cute and oh so nice i developed a crush on him but he had a girlfriend and i had bf but that didnt stop us we started talking nd flirting and ended up making out but after we made out he wanted more but i said no i really liked him so i texted hym and his gf answered and he told his girlfriend that he didnt know who i was and that we werent friends he told everyone in the neighborhood we had kissed and done some other things my bf found out nd he got really mad but gave me another chance because the truth was i loved my bf so i havent talked to him ever since even though he lives next door to me and i see hym almost every day nd so what i thought was a nice guy ended up being a jackass and i ended up being engaged with my bf but i still have little crush on the guy but i promised my bf i was going to b good nd im keeping my promise
PART ONE:
For the impatient: It took me about 3 days to 'get over it' and I feel like a recovering addict.
Step1 - Read EVERY post on this blog. I mean it. It helps.
Step2 - Admit that this is only a crush. It isn't TRUE LOVE.
Step3 - Admit this is YOUR problem, the object of your affection should NOT be forced to deal with it. If he/she doesn't even know about it, all the better.
If you've honestly performed the first 3 steps, then you're ready to continue.
Step4 - Think of every crush you've ever had and the results of confessing them (or being found out). Humiliating, huh?
Step5 - Decide for that--for once in your miserable life--you're NOT going to mistreat yourself by going through that again. Yes, this step is the most difficult. We're constantly told that True Love can be a struggle and that we must be willing to fight for it. Fine, I concede the point. True Love is a struggle. Now go back and re-read Step2.
Step6 - Explain the situation to your best friend. Not your 'Frenemy' or 'Acquaintance'. I'm talking about your Stone-cold, With-you-to-the-Last-Stand, Blood-Brother or Soul-Sister. Tell anyone less and you might as well confess to your crush directly. (They will find out.)
Step7 - This suggestion--from one of the other posts--really helps. Listen to some music. I add that it must have a medium-to-fast beat and that you must MOVE with it. For at least a few hours. You'll feel the Fever break and have a deep sense of euphoria come over you. That's what it feels like to regain your self-respect.
Okay, now for my long boring story: PART TWO
PART TWO:
She's SO beautiful...and smart and funny and dynamic and...*sigh* (you get the picture). She's a coworker and she started talking to me about 3 weeks ago. Out of the blue. It's not that she--let's call her 'Amy'--would corner me or anything, but I quickly became aware of her whereabouts and habits and then offset mine to avoid her. (Now why would I have done that?) It didn't matter. Amy would still seek me out and we'd talk about 15 minutes each day. After a week, it hit me that she didn't think I was boring or weird and that she actually wanted to be friends.
(I know what it sounds like; Amy seeking me out instead of the other way around. Except that my best friend of 10 years makes light of how we first met: and how he had to chip away at my defenses for A MONTH before I'd talk with him. Of course, I don't remember it that way, but there it is. I'm not very social.)
Any road, I started noticing weird things about my behavior around Amy. Such as my defenses being completely down. (If she'd asked for the password of my home network, I'd've given it to her.) Or that I'd mention my wife every other sentence. (Yes, a REAL wife.) Or that I outed myself for wearing bifocals and made jokes about being a 'geezer'. (I just turned 40. Amy's 20.) Or that we related to each other like a couple of eight year-olds. (Did I mention our actual ages? Good.)
By Friday of the second week, I was feeling the most intense crush I've felt in...well...in the entire time of Amy's EXISTENCE. But by Saturday, I had stopped feeling so good about my rapport with Amy. Instead, I began to feel...creepy. Sunday, I sought out this blog. It was an incredible comfort.
Monday, I stayed at home. Fine! I'll be honest. I hid at home. (There's a weekly meeting on that day and Amy normally sits near me.)
Tuesday, I dodged a bullet. Amy had a project she had to finish and couldn't talk with me. I so desperately wanted to seek her out. (I almost did more than once.) What finally stopped me was the desire to put a friend's interests ahead of my own. So, I went back to my desk and started listening to some music. That's when the Fever finally broke. (And for the record: It's NOT a lovely way to burn.)
Wednesday, I was SO terrified. Did she know? Had I given myself away? (Women are really perceptive about these things.) My defenses were finally starting to come up, but if Amy ever confronted me on this, I wouldn't be able to deny it. I wanted to crawl under a rock.
Same time as always, Amy sat down next me and we began talking. Her body language was completely unguarded. (Almost how I imagine women act when men aren't around to ogle them.) Oh my God, she didn't have clue! Are you kidding me?! I don't think I've ever been so relieved in my life. I hadn't been undone and I still had a friend. I fall into the conversation. I think I'll be okay.
Thursday (today), back to normal. Amy bumped against me as she sat down. An innocent-enough act, but three things occurred to me: 1 - we'd never had physical contact before, 2 - she wasn't creeped out by it (in fact, I doubt she was even aware of it), and 3 - had that contact happened a week ago, I would've confessed to her AND given her the password to my home network. Instead, I simply moved over.
I guess I'll be acutely aware of little things like that for awhile. But that's okay. It's better than having Amy be acutely aware of --and uncomfortable around--me.
Since you made it this far, I'll reward you with cliche, but I swear it's the truth: it does get better. You can get over your crush.
My crush has been on and off for over 3 years and I am married, my crush just resigned from work and as of today is leaving to go interstate, I really wanted to say goodbye properly today and it very nearly happend, we talked like we hadn't for a long time but our conversation was interupted and I just walked away, why oh why did I walk away, I should have waited he looked at me with a why are you going look when I caught his eye, I thought we would get another chance to talk later today but it just didn't work out that way...I am an idiot but what is done is done and I can't change it...I am also disappointed that he didn't go out of his way to say bye to me it happened by accident and then he gave my colleague a kiss and not me right in front of me when he has given me kisses on the forehead, cheek even lips before! I was crushed and nearly burst out crying. I am now trying to convince myself that he didn't want to say bye because it would have been just too confronting for both of us...I am crazy its more that he just couldn't care less!!! I feel really sad about him leaving, that I won't see him anymore, but in a lot of ways glad that I may be able to now concentrate on my husband, by not seeing my crush at work will make life so much easier...but I will miss him. It has been a difficult friendship on and off as he is a manager and I am not, when we met he was more an equal, management role changed him a lot, but he was the only guy since meeting my husband that I let anywhere close to me physically (no sex) just always in my personal space when we talked, at work parties always ending up close dancing with me (what was that??), the flirting the way he would look at me like I mean't something to him, but I do know that he didn't reciprocate, or if he did, he wouldn't act on it because i was married. i think he loved talking to me I know I loved talking to him, always felt we got along too well. I had tried avoidance behaviour, he tried distancing behaviour also, then something changed in the last two weeks when he emailed me, phoned me, visited me in my office to chat, taking the opp to talk to me today using an excuse to keep talking, it was all because he knew he was leaving. I do love him but he will never know and I have to let my thoughts of him all go, I also love my husband...can you love two people at the same time...I am proof that you can, but they are just very different kinds of love, one that gives you butterflies and one that is steady strong reliable (but no romance) ahh enough already! I need to stop thinking about this, this blog has really helped me get things off my chest that I am unable to say to anyone else.
Hi guys, I feel your pain. I'm actually a guy in my forties, hopelessly in love with a sweet girl at work. On the days I know she is working, I come in looking my absolute best (I think I am a pretty good looking guy)and try to be charming and project self confidence. But when I see her chat with other guys I am just devastated. As far as her feelings--well, she smiles broadly at me when she first sees me and does attempt (sometimes) to keep the conversation flowing when we talk. Once in a great while, I catch her looking at me in the lunch room. Lately I've been trying to immerse myself in work in an effort to avoid fixating on her, to the delight of my boss! I really want this ghastly painful crush to end, because I am married and would never hurt my wife in a million years. But I find this other woman so attractive, coming from a country I am fascinated with and being sweet and smart.. Help!
Same here. I've been crushing on this guy for about a year now, (im in middle school), but he's a year older than me.
Although he seemed nondescript at first, I noticed that sometimes when we walked past each other he would turn around and look in my direction (we have lockers on the same floor). I thought that was really cute and sweet, and then I dont know how but he just suddenly appeared really really cute!!
He would also sometimes try to catch my eye, but im always too shy and end up looking down. IM SUCH AN IDIOT! After a few weeks, I started noticing him more and more and it just grew from there. Now I cant stop thinking about him.
Im not sure if hes still into me. Im pretty sure he has tried to get over me a few times, considering how he stops looking at me so frequently at those times when we bump into each other. But I don't know how to approach him. Im a really really shy person, and im afraid he'll think that im weird for talking to him randomly out of the blue. Plus, the thing that really kills me is that there are actually other cute guys IN MY GRADE that like me.
I don't know why, but I just dont end up falling for them as hard as I did and still am for him!
Im really confused (about everything!) now!!
D:
Same here. I've been crushing on this guy for about a year now, (im in middle school), but he's a year older than me.
Although he seemed nondescript at first, I noticed that sometimes when we walked past each other he would turn around and look in my direction (we have lockers on the same floor). I thought that was really cute, and then I dont know how but he just seemed really really sweet.
He would also sometimes try to catch my eye, but im always too shy and end up looking down. IM SUCH AN IDIOT! After a few weeks, I started noticing him more and more and it just grew from there. Now I cant stop thinking about him.
Im not sure if hes still into me. Im pretty sure he has tried to get over me a few times, considering how he stops looking at me so frequently at those times when we bump into each other. But I don't know how to approach him. Im a really really shy person, and im afraid he'll think that im weird for talking to him randomly out of the blue. Plus, the thing that really kills me is that there are actually other cute guys IN MY GRADE that like me.
I don't know why, but I just dont end up falling for them as hard as I did and still am for him!
Im really confused (about everything!) now!!
D:
I actually have quite a serious crush as of now. The guy I like, for about 2years now, is also pining for an unrequited love of about 5years. Everyone says that we like each other and that I may be that girl. But somehow, you just feel like you don't want to get hurt anymore. I confessed to him before, and even though he has been much nicer to me, he ignores me now. He treats me differently from other girls, as in I am the only girl that he doesn't tease. It's as if he's avoiding me. And he hasn't given me a reply to my confession as of now. I just wish that he would.
I visited this website two years ago, but I never left anything. I, too , have had a long crush on someone--for about 5 or 6 years. It sucks because sometimes I swear I'm over it, but then boom, sometimes the memory of him and what I felt for him hits me like a strong gust of wind and I'm cruelly set straight that I'm not over him.
More than anything, I wish that I could see him again so that he could offer some closure on that part of my life. At this point, I wouldn't even care if he said he hated me. I just need him to set me free from this spell. Though, if I were to truly be honest, I'd admit that I'd wish to be with him or at least give it a shot. Oh well, they say that you can't always get what you want.
Oh my, oh my. I'm only 15 and I have had the largest crush on this guy for a year or so. I dont know what to. We used to be best friends and thennwe had a blow out and hated each other for two months. Siince school has started upnagain we have reconnected...alot. I really think he knows I like him. Everyone teases us saying we will be married some day. We tease each ither and he touches me often. That sounded creepy, but just like arm around the shoulder and legs touching.Hes always making jokes about us "doing things" and its just crazy. Even the lunch ladies jaber on about "Oh, young love", but I think hes just doing it to be an ass. I know he doesnt feel the same way about me. My heart skips a beat and my stomach flutters. I cant stop taling at a mile a minutes and I know he has none of that for me. He must just want to play with my emotions. Hes no player if thats what your thinking. Hes never even had a firlfriend and hes 16. I helped him through his last crush and im always there for him. It just seems i will never be able to be his #1. I will just remain in 2nd commpared to anyone else. I really need to get over him. Hes an addiction and I just cant seem to get rid of the drug. (yes i just made up that and it was good :P) -S.
Oh my, oh my. I'm only 15 and I have had the largest crush on this guy for a year or so. I dont know what to. We used to be best friends and thennwe had a blow out and hated each other for two months. Siince school has started upnagain we have reconnected...alot. I really think he knows I like him. Everyone teases us saying we will be married some day. We tease each ither and he touches me often. That sounded creepy, but just like arm around the shoulder and legs touching.Hes always making jokes about us "doing things" and its just crazy. Even the lunch ladies jaber on about "Oh, young love", but I think hes just doing it to be an ass. I know he doesnt feel the same way about me. My heart skips a beat and my stomach flutters. I cant stop taling at a mile a minutes and I know he has none of that for me. He must just want to play with my emotions. Hes no player if thats what your thinking. Hes never even had a firlfriend and hes 16. I helped him through his last crush and im always there for him. It just seems i will never be able to be his #1. I will just remain in 2nd commpared to anyone else. I really need to get over him. Hes an addiction and I just cant seem to get rid of the drug. (yes i just made up that and it was good :P) -S.
I really know how this feels. Somebody not returning your feelings can make you doubt everything about yourself and that is a horrible position to be in. I have known this guy at work for over a year. We started as just friends and i felt that we were getting really close and that something was developing and thought he felt the same way. About six months after we first met we had a drunken snog and i thought after that we were going somewhere. We had a disscussion a few weeks later and he said he didnt want anything serious but would be happy to be casual but he would not let it go anywhere, he did give me the option to opt out then and there and remain friends but I stupidly thought i could change his mine. We started sleeping together and this continued for just over a month, in this time i was getting more and more into him. Looking back I know I was a bit full on considering he just wanted to be casual. Also looking back he was extremely laid back and not bothered often asking me to leave after we had slept together ( nice) but i still thought i could make it work. Then one night he turned round and said he wanted nothing at all and I was heartbroken. Since then we have continued to be friends and have been still occasionly hooking up but his mixed signals have driven me mad.I am still struggling to understand why we are not together and he seems uncaring. I confronted him last week and he told me he did like me and i did 'tick all the boxes'but he didnt see us together and pretty much never would. It hurt. We work and live together which makes it worse and I just cant seem to get over it, i just cant stop analysing why he does not want me and what I have done wrong. I feel like i have read the whole situation wrong over the last year. To make things worse i managed to get into his private social network account and read some really horrible things he said about me. I now feel like i am going mad and it is not like me to be like this. I also now have major guilt about invading his privacy. I want to cut him out completely as i struggle to be around him without reading into evrything and stillhaving hope but I miss him too much when he is not around. He is pretty much ignoring me at the moment and i am still chasing him!AHH.it is starting to affect my work as i cant focus on anything else. Where do I go from here....
I'm a 47 year old woman, had only 2 serious relationships (both long term), and I don't fall for a guy easily. Never have, I'm very choosy. (Though I have no right to be: I am very overweight and, IMO, unattractive) I'm living in what is basically a homeless shelter and now I am receiving Social Security for disability.
I made some new friends here, one which has a crush on me (he likes big women, and I'm pretty big) who is a few years older than me at 52, one that I like as a friend but our religions clash (Christian & Wiccan), and one that is 15 years my junior and has a lot of problems, but is a sweet, caring individual. Oh, and in my opinion, very good looking. (He knows he's fairly cute, too, and is playful about it.) We have a lot in common, and we get along great, and in the past couple of weeks have started hanging out a LOT, watching movies and talking. 2 Nights ago we snuck some booze into the place and I got really drunk. He didn't drink as much, and said he has a hard time getting drunk anyway. We (The group of us) usually make sexual jokes, makign fun of each other or even a little mini-flirting, except for one.
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Last night, drunk off my ass, I told him I liked him. He told me he didn't like me like that, and of course, I was crushed. We spoke about a lot of stuff, as I cried and tried to keep it together. Basically, he is leaving it up to me if we should still be friends. I told him I couldn't be around him, it hurt too much, especially when I know he's flirting with others (way thinner than I, and also they are much younger than he is). He says he is not presently looking for a relationship, just flirting and trying to find out more about the women he is attracted to before jumping into a relationship. (Which I think is smart) He has a lot of issues he is dealing with mental-health wise, and as I see, he is doing well.
The thing is, this has left my self-image shattered. I don't want to be around him for a lot of reasons, but the worst is, I think, is that he now KNOWS I like him, deeply, and I can't understand why we have this great chemistry but he doesn't want ot take this a little farthur, even 'on spec.' Hell, I may not like it once it goes further! (Hey, it could happen). But it won't happen, and I can only attribute it to my weight/appearance, and probably the age difference. I usually hate people who are like that...treat you differently because of your looks/disabilities, etc. I don't know what to do with the feelings I have for him. I actually have thought about killing myself, TOTALLY unlike me.
He's a great friend, very giving/helpful, selfless and kind of a 'walking wounded' who empathizes with the pain of others, and always wants to help people. (I myself am similar, and am always doing what I can for friends and even strangers, as I am able.)
There are other factors in the situation...things too long to put here, but also things that are not my place to tell. (I feel I may already have said too much about my crush.)
The worst art...the part that makes it SO HARD to deal with...is that after the break-up of my 14 year relationship I had a close friend who I became roommates with who basically up and abandoned me to live on her own, me being on public assistance and having no where to go. The 14 year break-up made me decide that I must be done with love, I;ve had my 2 deep loves, and I always get thrown away, not good enough to keep. Must be somethign wrong with me. So, I gave up on love. Then my friend abandoned me (I knwo she needed to do what she needed to do, but it still hurt), and it deepened this feeling of somethign being wrong with me. I started going to a psychiatrist (who proscribed prozac, of course) and a therapist. Then I met him, and I didn't even realize I liked him until...oh, maybe 2-3 weeks ago, after we started hanging out a lot away from the others. So, Im left feeling so lost and in such pain, and I feel like there must be somethign wrong with me that no one can love me. I don't understand it, and just when I thought I was past feeling romantically for anyone....it happens. And I'm rejected, again. I can't take this again. It feels almost physical. Sadly, when he's around (saw him today), I feel better....his presence is like a balm to the pain. i miss him when I aren't with him. It almost feels obsessive, and that scares me too. But when he's gone, I hurt again. Can't understand it, can't stop it, feel like I'm loosing my mind. If anyone has any advice, please share.
If u want to get over a "crush" or "relationship" where you are the one who is "obsessed", you need to leave the person alone for a little while.....and take care of yourself by doing things you like to do, exercising, meeting new people, eating right, dressing better, looking better and overall just being happy.....and having limited contact with the person for a good while...like a few months.......meaning...all emails, instant messaging, phone calls, text messaging etc that you do often ..need to be cut off for a while.....don't contact the person, if they try to contact u don't reply.....When the person realizes that you are doing better with your life...they would start to think...you are having a great time without them and would try all the avenues to get back with you
Has not worked.
I have not had ANY contact with the kid whom I have a crush on for over 5 years and I STILL like him. It's ridiculous.
well, i am in high school and when i moved here at the beginning of 2010, there was one guy that was nice to me, i really liked him but those feelings didnt really develop until 2011.now i was crazy about him, i wrote poems about him i sang love songs more passionately because i knew the feeling. but all this time i dint know how he felt. meanwhile, my cooking partner and one of my best friends, i shall refer to as V, was his best friend and confidante, and she didnt know who he liked either... so , one day when we went on a trip to the bowling alley for good behaviour, i wasnt in his team, but i was in the lane right next to him, i couldnt play properly because i was too busy daydreaming and being all giddy about him talking to me. but i wasnt showing that giddiness and he asked me what was wrong. i said i was frustrated with myself for not telling someone something. i never intended telling him my feelings for him until then, but i couldnt back out, he was so kind and friendly, but when he pulled me aside for me to tell him who i liked, h replied with , "well i dont blame you " in his funny way, but didnt tell me how he felt.
anywho when i went back to school, i didnt really hear that much from him over the next few days aside from idle chatting. and darn my curiosoty i had to know how he felt, i couldnt ask him openly because of his friends, so i wrote a letter and gave it to him befopre form class.in which i asked him to reply before the day was over. he came up to me at lunch and we took a little walk, good thing my face was already red from handball...
anyway, i knew it wouldnt be good but i was secretly hoping tat it would be.so, he told me that he didnt feel that way about me, in stead, because he trusts me he told me who he does like. you guessed it , V.what is a real kick in the babymaker is that he said we were very alike. that made me want to cry. i was so upset, but not made, he was worried that i would be angry with them, but i simply said that i cannot help the way that other people feel, and that i wished them happiness.
i said this with a heavy heart, because i knew that V did not feel that way about him, she liked someone else that she cannot have becuse, well, age difference, like he is a teacher with a girlfriend.funny triangles, because that teacher is my friend more than a teacher because my sister is a teacher at my school so yeah. fun times...
irony is so funny.ha.ha.
p.s. sorry for the long post, i just havent fully vented, so i have had this bottled up inside for a few months, and i am still as crazy about him than ever.thankyou
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Heyy i have a huge crush on this guy. im a freshmen and hes a junior in high school. i have liked him since like the beginning of the year. i told one of my friends about him and what i thought of him, then she goes and tells her bf . and her bf is friends with the guy i like and all 3 of us are in the same art class. and today her bf decides to blurt it out an of course i denied it. but anyway friends shouldnt tell other people about that right? i dont really know what to do i mean i deleted her of my fb but i dint know what to do now, of course i still like him but i need to face it and get over him but i just dont know how! anyway please help...
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I have had the same crush for a year. It has crushed me the whole time. I see him and it starts all over. I can't stop myself. He acts interested and then he completely disappears until I run into him again. We have never hooked up because whenever we seem to hang out we get this major vibe and either he or I leaves. I need to get over this badly.
I had a crush on a man, we eventually got together, but he rushed things so much that we slept together too early on. Then he backed off which i was shocked and hurt about, he said he didn't know what he wanted. He came onto me again and took advantage of me as i said I liked him, we slept together again. Then he sent me a message saying sorry he's not been in contact for 9 with a list of excuses - been busy working, been ill ..
So I backed off completely deleted his messages and number, tried to get over him. Then he sent me a message. I messaged back a day later and here I am again in the same position i was a month a go. i hate feeling like this, wanting a man that doesn't care about me. I've told him he has hurt me, he said it wasn't deliberate. I think he must have been badly hurt by a girlfriend or something and still be thinking of her, he never has said though. I messaged him yesterday and told him I'm having a break from men. I need the contact with him to stop completely or I will not get over him.
hey guys i need help...i have a crush on someone who's 10 years elder than me. i think he sees me as a good friend or maybe a sister. i can't help myself. but he is a good guy. i really build hope when my friends tease me by his name. but i don't think he deserves me, he deserves much better. i tried my best to get over him but it's just not happening....
I've been in love with one of my good friends for seven years now. We went to high school together. He loved to tease me about how i always end up saying random funny things. It was his jovial nature that made me fall for him. But he had a huge crush on another girl in school. They never dated but i still remember that sunken feeling i used to get when they were talking. I kept comparing myself to her and every time my self esteem plummeted. I asked him to join me on a trip once and I introduced him to this random girl I met that day and she ended up asking him out. I felt sick. kept thinking what if I never took him there? what if??
We parted ways for college and ended up being literary worlds apart. yet the ocasional fb/msn chats were always present. i was nearing the end of my college years and he had broken up with that girl by then. one day we were chatting when he told me i was his fav girl...you can imagine the high i got...i still go over the saved IM...over and over and over again..
And that is why i flew half way across the world to go to grad school in the same city as him. Seeing him after all the years was indeed a treat. He had changed and looked so much more handsome!! We became pretty close friends once again and on my b'day he grabbed me aside and wished me at midnight saying he wants to be the first. I think from that point onwards he kind of knew that i had a crush on him cos i started hinting, hoping he'll give me similar signs.
BUT instead he started completely withdrawing from me. I could feel how at friend gatherings he would purposely avoid being next to me for photos or would never call me unless i called him first. he'd still talk nicely but i could take a hint you know.
Recently he started dating this girl and this time its serious. the worst is that i still meet him from time to time and since we never dated to break up in the first place i cant avoid him or cut contact with him completely. 'Moving on' is really a problem and a part of me just does not want to avoid him!
I cracked. I would wake up with the most empty feeling, get palpitations, throw up and cry for no apparent reason. It was that feeling that if he said no to me no one in the whole world would fall for me. I thought i could never love anyone else ever and i would hate myself thinking i was too overweight, ugly etc...i could love him and hate him with such passion at the same time.
I went to a psychologist...a real life safer. She told me its important to rebuild my self esteem and 'fake it till you make it''. confidence she said is one of the most attractive attributes for anyone. I spent more time focusing on myself and actually havnt felt more happier before..I realized that what i loved about him was this image i had of him from school years. He was no longer this. He was in the cut throat world of corporate business. His new friends were no longer my friends, and everything i imagined we had in common were things that i convinced myself i liked just because he liked them.
Come to think of him, my unrequited love was for someone who never truly existed in the first place. So today i met hm after about a 3 month gap. When he left early to his gf's place i still got that sinking feeling i felt seven years ago. and let's face it i might continue to feel it for who knows how long? I've never let myself think of havin a relationship with anyone else and maybe i might continue to do so for sometime. But the important thing is i've realized it and i let myself feel the hurt without making it completely engulf my life. I'm aware of the pain and try not to deny it nor allow it to take control of my life.
As i once saw on a friends fb wall 'sometimes god's best gifts are unanswered prayers'...who knows if this is true? only time will tell.....
I enjoyed reading this and several of the 166 posters. You really have quite an audience. So here is the 167th tale, probably ranking among the most ridiculous ones. I should probably not label my feelings regardless. But basically, there is this bartender. Immediately red flags should go up. No one should get a crush on a bartender you just met. Well I met him about a month and a half ago. I've seen him four or five times in my life. I actually asked him out (as in not in a date) but more like a social outing involving other people. So I went along and at first he seemed very interested but as the night went along, I started to feel like he wasn't really paying attention to me, even though one of the people present in the bar we went to told me I was apparently "claimed." But he was running back and forth a lot to the point that he kind of pissed me off and I left. This was maybe two weeks ago. During the ensuing days, I felt so sad. It really doesn't help that he is one of the most stunning-looking people I have ever met. I swore I wouldn't call or text him (and I have not). About a week later (last week) I started socializing and I met another guy who was also very good-looking, and very nice, though I've come to notice that he's probably a little vapid, but he was just what I needed to get my mind off the bartender. This was until a couple of days ago when my friend had the brilliant idea of taking another friend to celebrate her birthday at the same restaurant as the beautiful bartender and this basically reopened the wound. I said hello to him and he said hello to me but there wasn't look in his eyes that was inquisitive about me as before. I also felt that my behavior was a bit awkward, which probably is a result of the crush, but I never want to go back there again (and I probably will not). The problem is that for the past two days I cannot get his face out of my thoughts. I am walking down the street, on the train, doing my homework, and I remember his aloof face and it hurts more than I can possibly justify it for such an insignificant history that I have with this person.
I've had a crush on a co worker, actually my supervisor, for about 7 months now. When I first saw her I felt like someone punched me the stomach. I tried to fight it in the beginning because we were both married. However my marriage had been on the rocks for about 2 years already and I soon realized the marriage was over. My spouse and I decided to end the marriage.
As months passed, I thought the feelings were mutual and it was a serendipitous moment- the kind of moment people write about in movies. At one point she even told me to call her when she went on vacation...instead I texted but when I told her about my marriage ending, she never replied. It was clear at that moment she, although flattered, did not share my kismic thoughts. This realization has once again left me feeling like someone punched me, but this time in the chest. I'm okay with it all, but I've begun to self evaluate my behaviors with her. Fortunately, I honestly believe if the feeling isn't mutual, it isn't a true emotion but a projection of some other issues that I'm avoiding. I am hoping we can continue to work together without any awkwardness but only time will tell. If anything, I am truly thankful she came in to my life because she has managed to inspire me in many different ways...I've even begun writing poetry again. I guess people come in and out of your life for different reasons; sometimes it's not the reason you initially thought, but an important reason no less. Perhaps her purpose in my life was to wake me up and remind me that I have choices; I don't have to settle for anything.
Thank you dearest muse.
a crush is the most torturous thing that can ever happen to someone..anyday..anytime. knowing the fact that the other person would never revert back with feelings like yours, its even more painful to deal with the trauma. like my crush has been for about 5 yrs, and yet i am struggling to get over him. he maybe my friend, but talking to him only gives fuel to the fire.. he may know he was my first crush, but it cant help him to feel the same for me..that's life. and the only solution is.....get rid of it as soon as possible..
I end with this- when you have a broken heart, you cry a river, build a bridge on it, and then get over it!!
I've had a crush on my neighbour for most of teen/adult life. That's over 15 years. I am good friends with his sister, and very close to his family. I never told him how I felt because it would be too embarrassing and awkward if he turned me down and our families knew. We have the same interests. He is a really nice guy, and would be someone I know would never hurt me. He is very religious, and I am not. He has only ever dated religious girls, so I guess I was just out of the question. I think he did have feelings for me, but he never said anything, and I didn't live up to his religious standards. Now he is getting married after only dating a girl for less than a year. I don't know how to get over him when I have had this idea in my head that we would be together for so long. The worst part is that I am invited to his wedding. I don't know if I can sit and happily watch some other girl walk down the isle with him.
I get this.
Reading these stories makes me realize I am not the only one going through this. So here is my story. I was a freshmen in college and I met this guy at a party( stupid, I know)and i agreed to dance with him. He was so polite kind and funny. I never clicked with anyone like that. We kissed the same night( a mistake, was my first kiss. He asked for my number and he would text me inviting me out and i would reply. It was back and fourth. So I went out with him like 4 or 5 times. Then out of nowhere he stops texting me. I texted him like 3 times after, but I got the hint he didn't want to talk to me. I don't know why he stopped. We both had so much fun together. Guys are confusing:/
Seriously, I started to think that I am not the only one in this type of relationship after read those experience.It took me 9 years to forget him completely and have a crush on other guy last year. But still, the new one is unrequited also.The pain of 9 years is diminished and he (the new one)is quite disappointing me since I really hope we can make it.I believe I am quickly healed from the wound and waiting for the new start. 9 years wound is such a waste since I took a long way to forget him but please guys, I still have faith in this life.So you should be the same!
Seriously, I started to think that I am not the only one in this type of relationship after read those experience.It took me 9 years to forget him completely and have a crush on other guy last year. But still, the new one is unrequited also.The pain of 9 years is diminished and he (the new one)is quite disappointing me since I really hope we can make it.I believe I am quickly healed from the wound and waiting for the new start. 9 years wound is such a waste since I took a long way to forget him but please guys, I still have faith in this life.So you should be the same!
My husband and I have been married for 4 years come next month, even though we have known each other for 6 years. We are a blended family, me bringing 2 children and him bringing 3 children into the marriage. My husband is an Army. 7 months after we met he was deployed overseas for 15 months. We were both going through divorces and weren't ready for a relationship. He came back and we got together and shortly after that we were married. 6 months after that he was stationed to japan for a year. During the last 4 years we have had our ups and downs, hurts and resentments as well as dealing with past hurts from past relationships, dealing with the fact that he been coming and going due to the military. I admit that I haven't treated him the way I'm supposed to so i contacted the freemercytemple@yahoo.com the temple told me what to do when he comes back again. The last deployment I sunk into a deep depression and struggled to get out of. He's been home since March and it's been extremely good and now he is not sure to go back again. He has love me more than ever, but he is hoping that he get another job better than that. The only thing is that even if he can stay like this i am so so happy. I know that I have a long road ahead but I have enough faith for the both of us and I still believe in us and in our marriage,thank to the freemercytemple@yahoo.com for making him stay with me again,i will contact him for a spell to make my husband to get a new job.
My husband and I have been married for 4 years come next month, even though we have known each other for 6 years. We are a blended family, me bringing 2 children and him bringing 3 children into the marriage. My husband is an Army. 7 months after we met he was deployed overseas for 15 months. We were both going through divorces and weren't ready for a relationship. He came back and we got together and shortly after that we were married. 6 months after that he was stationed to japan for a year. During the last 4 years we have had our ups and downs, hurts and resentments as well as dealing with past hurts from past relationships, dealing with the fact that he been coming and going due to the military. I admit that I haven't treated him the way I'm supposed to so i contacted the freemercytemple@yahoo.com the temple told me what to do when he comes back again. The last deployment I sunk into a deep depression and struggled to get out of. He's been home since March and it's been extremely good and now he is not sure to go back again. He has love me more than ever, but he is hoping that he get another job better than that. The only thing is that even if he can stay like this i am so so happy. I know that I have a long road ahead but I have enough faith for the both of us and I still believe in us and in our marriage,thank to the freemercytemple@yahoo.com for making him stay with me again,i will contact him for a spell to make my husband to get a new job.
I recently have a new group of friends. Most of them are gay that includes men and women. I am a straight woman and have never been confused about my sexuality until now. I have a crush on a woman. It has totally taken me by surprise.
One night while were all out drinking, I kissed her and she kissed me back. We still don't know how we got to this point. Anyway I liked it ( I kissed a girl and I liked it) I told her that I wasn't that drunk and that I found her attractive. She was in shock but and felt like it was an honor but that was it. We kissed again the next day, but for some reason it didn't feel the same. Anyway I'm not her type and she hasn't said anything and neither have I. I still am attracted to her and I still have a crush but I'm putting some distance between us because I don't want there to be any akward feelings between us because we hang out with the same group of friends. I'm confused because I love men but on the other hand I feel rejected and hurt. I'm am CONFUSED! right now and a little sad, but this to shall pass.
I know what it's like to be crushing on a person for a long time. I have been crushing on the same guy for 4 years now. I like him, and he likes me. Sounds great right!? Well it is, except that he lives like 1000 miles away from me, in a completely different state and i only get to see him once a year during the summer for one day, if that.
During the time that I am not with him we don't even get to talk. Maybe like once if we are on facebook at the same time. But no matter how long the time is between we have seen each other it is always the same unspoken bond between us. Every now and then he comes to my mind and my heart aches knowing that it will be a long time till I can possibly see him again. As of right now, I saw him only yesterday and you have no idea how bad i want to go back. It's especially hard because there is a chance we may not see eachother again as we are both going away to college next summer.
It's so hard to get over somebody when all you do is think about them. You have to learn to let go. Stop thinking about them, stop talking to them, stop stalking their profile, and dont go to the places you used to go together. I am a hopless romantic so I always think about how yesterday at this time we were walking in the woods and such and it will drive me and you crazy if you constantly do that. Don't watch any love movies or listen to love songs til you are completely over him. I hope this helps.
Thanks :D
In same situation two yr crush on guy at work.we r both married.i remember when he firststarted flirting with me and i thought please dont let me fall for him.he is a very sexy funny dr and its like he can read my mind. He has texted me and called me late at night with stupid exscuses for calling. I am trying to shut down on him at work but he still moves in on me, talking etc. I know he would never take it further as he would be terrified to go over the edge but he pushes it with the things he says the way he touches me, and then i get sucked in again. After weird midnight text phone call i messaged him asking if he was attracted to me or if i was just imagining it he kind of freaked asking why i was asking him this if he had treated me wrong or caused trouble. I thought great game over but he starts it up again. I am going to ignore it this week.
I dont know what to say, but men are strange. Love and care for yourself, you are special and wonderfull too good for him. Have fun with friends dont hang around him it will get your hopes up again the old bandaid thing and when u least expect the fight one will come along xxxooo
So true it is because they t unavailable i keep telling myself this
I'm struggling through this too right now. I'm a married man in a realtionship thats in a total stall and visit massage parlors once (sometimes more) a week for a realxing massage and climax. The woman who runs this place is the lady I'm infatuated with. It all started when she began texting me - just small talk and cutsie pie shit. But, I became totally dependent on these texts and would get all bent out of shape when she didnt reply right away. I'm sure she likes me (friend and CUSTOMER) but I'm pretty sure shes texting a lot of guys. Pretty smart business model. Anyway, I started sharing private things about my relationship and she eventually dis the same.. She's married with 3 kids and is cheating on her husband with a boyfriend.. Nice. Like a fucking class a schmuck though - I'm still willing to deal with it for the attention she paid. As I write this I'm embarassed but as the expression goes - The heart wants what the heart wants.. I seriously wish there was some place to get brain washed back into mad passionate love with my wife. A woman who clearly loves me since she's put up with me for so long. I waon't readyour replies so have a blast.
i have a crush on a guy since a year. i have fallen for him so badly that i am not being able to come out of it! there isn't a single day i don't think of him. I fantasize about him, i think of him like every second! i don't know why but its really, really deep..maybe too deep to get over him no matter how much i try. i have tried many a times to forget him and move on but it seems so impossible. you know why i have tried forgetting him?
Obvious answer, he doesn't like me. but the strange thing is that he does look at me, he does blush when i m around, he even looked at my eyes when we sat together in a class( that's the first time we talked, we did got introduced earlier but never had a casual talk). Then why is he with a another girl? why he has a girlfriend? after showing signals, why he is not with me? you know what, he even looks at me now, being in a relationship with someone else. every time i try to make myself strong and not to fall for him, i slip every time. the day i thought i would get over my one year crush, i don' know how but my teacher asked me to sit with him( it was an exam day). Again i fell for him. we talked so well. we exchanged smiles, he looked at my eyes while talking..aah! god why do i think of him so much!
whatever might be the reason. maybe he's a flirt. that;s what i can conclude. anyway, i have to get over him and i will. No matter what. i therefore need all your suggestions.. please, please help me. i am going through a very hard time and its even worse when you have to see him everyday. i need help.
I have a crush on someone 5 or 4 years older then me, and the sad thing is if I was older he would probably go out with me, and 4 years doesn't seem like that much of a difference, but because of our ages it seems so wrong right now... He knows who I am, because I am on tv but that's really not the point, I think his friends know I like him and sometimes they ask me about it but I hide it even though they already know I think :P the thing is I find myself obsessing over him like crazy! I go to certain places at certain times just so we can wave and say hey :) I look at my friends when I notice him saying "do I look okayy???" it makes me feel so immature and young like my very first crushes, even though im not that young anymore... He gives me the cutest smiles and in my ideal world we would be the same age. <3 I'm sorry I just thought I might comment because as everyone
It is such a relief to come across these posts....the past few months,I too have developed a crush on the handsomest man I know.....and whom I absolutely do not deserve....I have started retreating to spending my nights at home with family.....nights alone bring such a flurry of feelings for him.....to all of you, I am so thankful that you all are sharing your experiences and suggestions, and I hope you all are feeling much better now. All the best.
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