12 step program to recovery

"Tonight, I danced my butt off. But even in all the midst of the jumping around to old school hip hop I found myself alone. I called a friend of mine to see how they were doing. I then asked what they were getting into later in the evening. They told me that they were meeting up with a bunch of their friends to go to cleo's. No, not the strip joint. That place really ought to change it's name. anywho. They invited me along. Now I must inform the reader that I was not looking for an invitation."

so we go out. step up right next to dj bmf's .myspace.com/djbmf) turntables and jam out. but as i watch the person i came with have conversations with everyone except me i begin to drift into my old veronica mode. im sad on the inside but try to hide it on the outside. questioning if i have anything in common with this person whatsoever. whether this person just invited me along because they felt obligated. so at this point im upset and not enjoying myself as much as i would like. sending me through another realm of self-hate. i get home and i stand at the door for what seems to be eternity but only a split second and i see my life flash before my eyes. me. alone. quickly i come in, change out of my danced out clothes into my bob marley shirt and head for my 12 step program.

i wrote this three weeks ago and told myself i was going to read it everyday. i failed at doing that so im going back to start my mission over the right way.

i took every negative thing i thought about myself and turned into the positve. here they are as followed:

1) i am worthy to be loved

2) i am beautiful

3) i have the ability to do whatever i choose to do and do it well

4) i accomplish all my tasks before deadline

5) i am powerful

6) i am stress free

7) i am intelligent and always willing to learn more

8) i treasure my alone time

9) i create action

10) i am gifted, blessed and anoited

11) i know where i am and where i am going

12) i love me