Indecision creates stagnation part 1

I was reading the "What I know to be true" section in the Oprah magazine (yes, I read Oprah) and she wrote about creating change for yourself. She mentioned a time where there was a mother who was having trouble getting her 4 year old son to sleep in his bedroom. Oprah had a psychologist to come in and analyze the footage of this mother trying to put her child to sleep and saw that she always allowed him to sleep with her. It was here that the psychologist said, "Nothing happens until you decide." Later the mother made the decision to put her child in his room even if that meant him kicking and screaming for a few nights. Eventually he recognized that his mother was serious and that he had no choice in the matter. I found that within this story I am both the mother and the child.

If you take the time to go back a few blog entries you will see one where I talk about going through a few life changes in order to better myself. Maybe I figured if I were to put it into writing where the entire world can read it it would be my motivation to become active in those goal choices. FALSE!!! Putting it in writing or telling one of my friends does not instantly create that change. I have to decide to do it and then I have to do it. Plan and simple.

Recently I was asked when it would be my time to get married. This was asked after a wedding of a friend of mine. He asked me if I was ready. I said no because I hadn't found anyone to marry yet. He proceeded to ask me what was I looking in my future husband. We went through a list of things but as I thought back later on that conversation I saw that I never ask what I want my husband to look for in me. I never ask what I want to have for myself. We spend all of this time looking for this soulmate and never working on perfecting the soul we already possess. Ours. So, here I am back to the drawing board.

I must make some confessions before I can begin. I have to call out my false truths.

continued in the next blog....