Beat me a beat beatboxer!

"I met god last night and her name is sound"

last night was the dopest concert i have been to in a long time. ucf's organization hillel and elements sponsored an event called BRINGIN' BACK THE BEATBOX. they flew in two of the dopest beatboxers (after rubox) and they vibrated every molecule in my body. the beatboxers were KID BEYOND (www.kidbeyond.com) and TIM BARSKEY. both are of jewish desent that are intouch with their inner hip hop.

The show opened with RUBOX (www.nonsenserecords.com/rubox.html) blowing up the mic. i love to see him perform. i get this proud feeling as if he was my child. god bless his mother and father. everytime i see him he makes me want to step up my game as a performer. im glad he is my beatboxer. now, not only did he perform but he also hosted. talk about multi tasking. did i mention that i was proud? following rubox was DJ SPS (www.nonsenserecords.com/sps.html). sps is the badest dj to ever walk the face of the earth.

my nephew and my godneice were going to come to experience this amazing night. but my nephew had to study for his test in summer school. luckly my godneice, jazzia, was able to come and be blown away. when sps began his set i made sure she stood right in front of the turntables. jazzia is 13 years old and never saw anything like this before. she had the advantage. i was 25 when i saw sps for the first time.

so after sps melted vinyl with his fingers, kid beyond approached the stage and worked his magic. now i have to back track a week here to make sense of what i will say later. my boy kelly let me listen to his portishead cd. wandering star is my new favorite song. last night kid beyond perform wandering star using only his voice. and this is when i say that everything happens for a reason. kid beyond beatboxed his ass off. the dissapointing this was that there were people talking through his performance. whatever happened to passing notes. anywho, kid beyond finished his performance and was followed by tim barsky.

tim barsky beatboxes and plays the flute at the same time. he was very good. he was having a problem with the sound which made it difficult to hear himself as he attempted to play. i figured people didnt understand this and decided to leave but it was all good. he was playing for me.

before the night ended a few kids came in who had arrived late. they talk to kid beyond and he did an extra set for them. this time he had sps accompany him. sps needs to stay in contact with him to do some work on an album.

my only regret last night was not having any money to get a cd from kid beyond. i wanted to get one for my nephew. his birthday is saturday so i will just have to order from cd baby (http://cdbaby.com/cd/kidbeyond).

that night reached its hand in my heart and beatboxed on my heartstrings.

Go Starbananas!

"Laughing wild amid severest woe."

-Holly Riggs line from Laughing Wild

tonight i was so proud of two of my closest friends. i was blown away by their production of Christopher Durang's Laughing Wild. it was the first time i would have the experience to see them do what do in the theatre world. and i must say, they do it so well.

if anyone should get the chance to see this production or the play done somewhere else it is a must see. the story follows two people exploring life,sex and death. holly played a woman who is mentally unstable and on her quest to be heard, seen and wanted while attempting to buy tuna fish. tod caviness plays a character who searches for positivity amist his obsessive negative thinking. i must mention that this is a comedy. it was also blatantly true and real.

holly does a scene where she screams how she wishes she was dead. that scene was all too real to me. it made me see how we all have these moments that just feel like they are unraveling with each second and you are desperately attempting to hold on. this play touched me greatly.

holly is my shining starbanana.

chasing ethan

"Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love."
-"Charlie Brown"

memories of my childhood are vague but i will always remember ethan. blond hair, blue eyes, birthmark of a mole over his lip. he was gorgeous. i had a crush on him for four years. all through elementary i did everything to get this boy to notice me. i found out that his favorite band was new kids on the block so when the fair came into town i won him a new kids on the block hat. my horrible attempt at buying someone's affection went unnoticed. i failed to mention that he was a major athlete. so my interest in kickball games and teather ball rose instantly. i started to like what he liked even if i didn't. i was good at this. pretending. pretending for love.

then he likes one of my best friends. she asks me if it was okay that they hook up. they were perfect for eachother. both loved sports. im sure there was more but as far as 5th grade goes thats all i knew. so this became the norm. girl falls for the boy. boy doesn't notice girl. boy notices girl's bestfriend. boy and girl's best friend date. girl is left to listen to them talk about eachother. girl would like to be gagged with a spoon.

unrequited love forces you to do things that you didn't think you would ever do. laughing at jokes when you know they aren't funny. being that garbage can for them when they need to dump their emotional trash. allowing them to touch you in places with hands void of love but full of want. you forget your friends when that person decides that they want to include you in their day.

hmm, i guess i have unrequited love for myself. havent taken the time to love me back. why? ive spent too much time trying to make someone else love me when the easy part is to just love myself. i couldve saved so much time, money and hospital bills if i recognized this early on. but hey, i did learn a lot about boy bands, basketball, football, business, jesus, tennis, naruto, the simpsons, halo, graffiti and hip hop(not neccessarily in that order).

Dr. Vest

Check out an amazing poet new to the Orlando scence. Jennifer Lisa Vest. www.mxdmessages.com. You will be sad if you dont.

I Secretly Hate CeCe Winans

"Okay, I must issue a disclaimer here: I do not secretly hate CeCe Winans or anyone with the same name."

yesterday, while i sat in my quietness due to a sore throat, i found myself thinking on past moments that have affected my life and the perception i have about myself. well, it hit me while i was in the bathroom but hey, thats the best place to contemplate about life. anywho, i remembered while my ex and i were dating how obsessed he had become with cece winans.

he loved her. he thought she was so beautiful, she could sing, she loved the lord, and at the time she had long hair. yes, i was jealous but it was the comments of how he wanted to marry her that made me not like her anymore. that may not be the "christian way" but it hurt my feelings. to know that the man i was madly in love was thinking about some other chick. that made me doubt myself.

trying to hold onto someone when you know deep down inside that they want someone that isnt you is a foolish thing. with those life moments i experienced im now doing a major overhaul of self hate. if i could visit my younger self i would tell her to hold on to herself. i would tell her that life doesnt have to be so hard because she loved hard. i would tell her to take it slow. dont say i love you unless you mean it. dont try to buy their affection, it doesnt work and you just end up broke anyways. then i would tell her to look in the mirror everyday of her life and tell herself that she is beautiful and worthy to be loved. but seeing that i have no time machine i can only prepare my future self in the now. so, i love you veronica. i love you too. :-)